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Dying To Tell

It's been a year already.

One year ago today, my mom passed away following a battle with cancer.

It's been a year of reflection. A year of tears. A year of memory-induced smiles. A year of frustrations. And a year of love.

In the past year, I was reminded of true friendship. In the past year, I was able to crystalize my priorities. In the past year, I was able to refocus and realign and repair.

And in the past year, I was able to heal and prepare to give back.

Adversity can bring people together in really unexpected ways. Months before Mom's passing, I learned that friend and fellow-blogger, Karen Putz, was going through a similar journey with her dad. Through many tweets, Facebook posts and text messages of encouragement, we shared a lot to help each other make it through those final months.

What came out of those messages was a lot of wisdom and insight. Right before our parents died (her dad passed away the morning of Mom's funeral), I asked Karen what she thought of sharing our journey with others. This is a project we've been tackling at our own speed over the past year. We've now created a book, tentatively titled: "Dying To Tell - A Guide for End-of-Life caregivers." Our goal was to provide others with practical advice through five different phases:

  1. Diagnosis
  2. Treatment
  3. Nearing the end
  4. Death and funeral
  5. Aftermath

Through short anecdotes and succinct bullet lists, we've written our best thoughts, advice, how-to's, and memories to help others. Little time savers, dealing with well-meaning but difficult bystanders, making early preparations, handling the funeral home, etc. - all were noteworthy in our world. We're still making some final tweaks as well as shopping for a publisher, but we believe we've crafted an easy-to-digest guide to help others through their end-of-life journey.

We'll keep you posted as we get closer to completion and release.

Our parents will continue to live on in our memories. Their legacy, even in death, will continue to help others. Our plan is to donate profits from the book to hospice organizations.

To all my friends and family who have had a positive role in helping me through the grieving process this past year, I thank you deeply and sincerely. You took my hand to get me through an incredible year.


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Dr. Delaney Kirk

Thinking of you today.

Karen PUtz

Tim, hugs to you at this one-year mark of passage. I'm so thankful that you were there with so much support during the final days. Memories live on in the heart-- your mom lives on forever in yours.

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