Is There a Killer Bunny In Your Office?

My wife and I recently saw the musical, Spamalot, based on the movie, Monty Python and the Holy Grail.  The movie was funny, but the musical was a riot!  One of my favorite parts in both stage and screen was the Killer Bunny:

We see this quite a bit in office politics as well, don't we?  Somebody seems nice, introduces himself or herself to you, wriggles their way into your confidence, and then ... BAM!!!  You find yourself attacked.  To support this, I present Exhibit A and Exhibit B and Exhibit C for your consideration (you can find others at www.office-politics.com; it doesn't take a lot of looking).

Are there ways to protect yourself from Office Killer Bunnies?  Well, outside of lobbing any Holy Hand Grenades, there are some tips you can use to prevent yourself from being the victim of a vicious bloody attack.  I recommend using some of the principles of Stranger Danger that we teach our children:

• If somebody is nice to you immediately, remain cordial and professional.  Do not divulge personal information about yourself prematurely.
• Wait for introductions from mutually trusted friends/acquaintances before opening up to a stranger.  If you have a trusted colleague who endorses this person, then it may be OK to talk to him/her.
• Just as your child should never be coaxed into a stranger's car, don't allow yourself to be coaxed into a stranger's cubicle confidence.  Sometimes we enter the workforce with a strong desire to be liked, and the Killer Bunnies of the world know this.  It shifts the balance of power when you get sucked in.
• As I suggested recently in Office-Politics.com, being nice is not an either-or dichotomy; it's a sliding scale continuum.  Just because you don't play the cruise director, doesn't mean you cannot still be cordial and professional.  It's all a matter of striking the right balance.

Again, the trick here is to avoid being chewed to bits by a Killer Bunny.  Using some common sense is one of the best approaches in a strange environment.  Approach wisely rather than rushing in.  You'll be glad you did it before you lose five... no, three... of your men.

That Really Frosts Me

I've always been a fan of Robert Frost's poem, The Road Not Taken.  The idea of personal choice and breaking away from the crowd always are strong themes with me.  Then my wife, the high school English teacher, told me a story she had read (from multiple sources) about the origin of this poem.  It seems that Frost had a friend who loved to take walks with him and would constantly distract them from their intended path with "Oh, hey, I saw this bush down here the other day that you've just got to see" or "I wonder what's down that trail... let's go!"  This poem wasn't so much one of personal choice, but rather a sarcastic jab about his friend's eccentricities.  My wife commented that if this story about the poem were true, how much Frost would be laughing at us all from beyond the grave about the meaning we tend to put on things.

I remember a recent post by Steve Farber. in which he shared that a reader got upset that he quoted HP-helm alum, Carly Fiorina.  Steve leads a great discussion on his blog about the relationship between the words and the source of the words.  If the person isn't living up to the words that he or she says, does it make the words any less true?  At a church that my wife and I attended when we were first married, a woman in the church used to berate the preacher almost every Sunday if he quoted or referenced anybody who did not fall chapter-and-verse into our church's doctrine.  (Boy, will she be surprised about who gets into heaven.)

One of the things we fail to do in Office Politics situations is assessing context.  Do words and actions sync up with the people creating them?  If something is out of context, it should be a red flag for us.  Often, though, we look only at the person (through halo effect) or the words/actions and we miss the entire context.  Because we don't see the whole big picture, we go down paths that do not lead to effective political conclusions.

Because we find out that Frost's poem wasn't an eloquent waxing about personal choice, does that mean the words can no longer be interpreted as such?  Does that mean we can only use Frost's words as a jab against focus-impaired acquaintances?  I sure hope not.  That would make all the difference.

(Don't) Stick To The Status Quo

This afternoon, I had the honor of escorting my older daughter to a local live performance of Disney's High School Musical at the Des Moines Playhouse.  While "teen bop" generally is not my preferred genre, let alone sitting in a theatre with hundreds of screaming children, the performance overall was well done.  Of course, any time spent with either of my daughters is a great investment regardless of the activity.

The plot of High School Musical is simple.  One of the basketball players and one of the "brainiacs" fall for each other, and they both try to break out of their stereotypical cliques by landing leading roles in their high school musical (hence, the name).  In their quest, they must deal with the basketball team, the other brainiacs, and the theater prima donas... none of whom are too happy about the change in roles.  One of the songs that caught my attention was called "Stick to the Status Quo."  The first half of the song was about suppressing the desires of kids to branch out into interests beyond their "assigned clique"; the remainder of the song was encouraging them to break out and try new things.

We may snicker at the concept of high school cliques, but I see a lot of people who are pigeon-holed in their careers.  Sometimes the labels are warranted from prolonged poor performance issues, but just as often they are simply unfair.  Heck, even I "fall victim" to the labels.  Being a part-time college professor, there are those who have used it as my primary professional label... those who have worked with me know I'm much more practitioner than theorist any day.

So, what can you do if you find yourself being pigeon-holed by others, thus stalling out your career?  Here are a few simple tips:

1. Figure out what you have done (or are doing) to fuel the perceptions.  This may take some honest but painful self assessment, but in the long run, it could benefit you.  If everyone else is perplexed about why you are not being promoted, and there's only one spiteful petty supervisor telling you that "you're just not promotion material" then there's cause for genuine concern on your part.
2. Take ownership of the perceptions.  You need to be aware of (and to own) the buzz that's being said about you.  If you want to be promoted to the next level, start acting like the next level.  Pursue assignments that they are working on.  Dress like them.  Act like them.  Hire a personal coach to help you get past any annoying habits or mannerisms.
3. Cultivate some outside interests/relationships.  I see too many people put complete stock into their jobs and careers and the perceptions held of them at these places... to the point of being unhealthy.  If your career is the only place in your life where you are not respected, consider yourself lucky.  You probably have other relationships that are far more valuable than work.
4. Move along, little doggie.  Sometimes, the perception of you may be buried deep in culture of your team or department... whether it is right or wrong.  You may need to come to terms with when it is time to move on, far away from the current set of players.

Those are just a few ideas.  What have you done to overcome negative perceptions and pigeon-holing in the past?  After all, "we're all in this together."

Dominate!!

Today, I had a fascinating experience.  I spent the day with numerous SWAT (Special Weapons And Tactics) Police teams from around the metro area, observing them as they practiced various entry scenarios.  There's actually a real business reason for my regressing to a desire to play "cops and robbers" for a day, but I'll get to that in another post.

There are many facets to a SWAT officer's job.  The first one is almost a paradox:  have a ton of might and weaponry and skill ... and hope against hope that you never ever have to use it.  The second is that the scope of the SWAT team is fairly well boundaried:  secure the facility and those within it.  That may sound simple, but after watching the various scenarios today, I realized very quickly that it isn't.  The number of unknowns facing tactical law enforcement is staggering:  the number of people in the building, the exact situation they're facing, how to enter, where people are located, who is armed and/or dangerous, who is threatening whose life.  I'm still processing it all, and I'm anticipating a sleepless night ahead.

The process they follow is pretty consistent

1. Enter (which may be peacefully through negotiation or forcefully if the need arises)
2. Secure the house (hostile individuals and hostages)
3. Centralize the people in the house
4. Secondary Sweep
5. Exit and hand off to the investigation team

I know I've oversimplified it (A LOT) by putting it in a 5-step process.  Having met with and talked with one of the commanders over the past several months, as well as meeting the teams today, there is a lot of complexity within this "consistent" process.  The one thing that is still ringing in my ears (besides the very loud flash-bang devices) is the shout of "DOMINATE!" which is a half-command/half-declaration to gain control of a specific area.  When they're on the job, these people mean business, and dominate means dominate.

We'd be afraid to use a term like "dominate" in business.  It sounds too harsh, too mean, too Simon Legree, and not nearly participative enough for our happy little cubicle-dwellers.  How many of us actually do put our necks out to dominate our business?  How many are accountable for making sure that processes work... and work well?  How many of us spend more time beating down the others who do want to try to "dominate" - not out of some maniacal need to control, but rather out of a strong desire for personal ownership?

"Dominate" seemed to resonate with me.  When I came up with Carpe Factum, it means to SEIZE the accomplishment.  Not overanalyze the accomplishment.  Not hold meetings about the accomplishment until people forget about it.  Not passively-aggressively support the accomplishment publicly only to sabotage it in private.  Seize the accomplishment.  Dominate it.

I'm really thankful there are SWAT teams out there.  Not only do I feel safer knowing that these law enforcement professionals know what they're doing and how to do it so well.  I feel great knowing that they are so good at their jobs that they can teach a thing or two to the business world.

What are you going to dominate?

(A huge thank you to all of the great people I met today.  You're a very special team of professionals who do an extremely important and dangerous job exceptionally well.  I appreciate your taking the time to let me tag along and ask you a lot of questions.  You made my day!)

Announcing... Carpe Factum Workshops

Some of you have asked me why I've been sporadic with my blog posts this summer.  I'll admit; it has been a little hit and miss, but I've had a good reason.

Over the past eighteen months, I worked with the Des Moines Higher Education Collaborative to create a series of classes entitled "The Art and Science of Project Management."  This was a project that had been in the works for two years prior to my coming on board.  While the DMHEC is shutting down operations, those who were instrumental in getting these classes up and running wanted to see our work continue.  I've had some great discussions with very insightful people who encouraged me to take this next step.

It is with immense pleasure that I officially announce the roll-out of Carpe Factum Training Workshops.  Initially, all workshops will be offered locally here in the Des Moines area.  Our sponsor at Iowabiz.com, Professional Solutions, has graciously allowed us to use their beautiful facilities for these workshops.  We are initially offering four workshops in some of the most essential skills needed for business today:

• Human Project Management
• Technical Project Management
• Managing Office Politics
• Creativity (Applied for Professional Business Settings)

In addition, I've teamed up with some very talented individuals to deliver these workshops.  Lyle Holman will be my co-instructor for both of the project management sessions.  Mark Yontz is working with me on the creativity workshop.  Dana Dennis is my teammate for the office politics workshop.

A special thanks to Sandy Renshaw for once again coming to my rescue with the website changes, setting up the registration page, and the Paypal link.

We're keeping the workshops affordable, focused, and real-world.  Our goal is for attendees to be better able to Carpe Factum... whatever that accomplishment may be.

Big Harry Deal

In a couple of days, the "Muggle World" finds out what happens to boy wizard, Harry Potter.  I have to admit, I've been following the plot from the first book, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, and I'm intrigued how things will get wrapped up.  From an office politics perspective, there are some fascinating dynamics going on... and no, I'm not going to write a book on office politics based on the Harry Potter series; we'll leave that for somebody with more self-punishing tendencies than I have.

Nevertheless, I have a few thoughts about what might happen in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows as JK Rowling attempts to tie up loose ends:

1.  Will Harry live or die?

He'll live and will conquer Voldemort, but not without consequence.  I've read that he may lose his memory or (more likely) his magical power in the process.  There will be some major sacrifice that will take place, and I don't even think it's out of the question that Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry could be leveled in the process.  After all, in "winning" office politics games, there are inevitably messy sacrifices that are made for the greater good.

2.  Is Snape friend or foe?

Severus Snape has appeared to be Harry's foe from the beginning; however, his apparent murder of headmaster Dumbledore was (I believe) on Dumbledore's orders.  Follow any hero's journey and the mentor figure must be removed for the hero to stand on his own.  Even at the end of the sixth book, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Dumbledore was emphasizing to his young student that Harry was the more valuable life that must endure.  It's obvious that Snape's animosity toward Harry is misplaced aggression from his feelings about his father, James Potter.  In office politics, we often see misplaced aggression driving ill-willed behavior toward others.  Snape will need to see the good in Harry from his mother, Lily.  The question will not be whether Snape is good or evil, but his motivations behind his apparent actions throughout the series; after all, figuring out motivation is a key skill in playing office politics.

3.  Who will bite the dust in the final book?

Rowling has promised at least two deaths of well-known characters.  My guess is that either Snape or Draco Malfoy will have an attack of conscience against Voldemort and will sacrifice himself at the end.  The good money is on Snape, as I believe Malfoy's character to be irredeemable, but who knows?  The other victim will be a Weasley, and I'm guessing Percy.  He's been annoying, and he's fairly expendable.  Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Nevil will survive.  In Office Politics, as in children's fiction, sometimes there is a bit of unfairness about who survives the battle.

4.  Who is R.A.B.?

There are no new characters being introduced in the last book, per Rowling herself.  Most of the people I've talked to and read on-line think that the "R.A.B." character who stole the locket is Regulus Black.  Not here.  My guess is that it is Amelia Bones (Amelia being her middle name).  If you recall from the beginning of the sixth book, the only person who could have obtained the locket was a talented witch or wizard (an adjective never used to describe Regulus).  Amelia, a very talented witch, was found dead in her apartment, my guess as punishment for stealing and destroying the Horcrux-holding locket.  In office politics, not readily revealing one's identity when taking action can have advantages (or consequences) further down the road.

5.  What of Petunia Dursley?

Harry's aunt and Lily's sister, knows more than she lets on.  After Dudley's attack in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, she showed that she knew about Azkaban and dementors and Voldemort.  Could she maybe be an undercover Auror?  Doubtful.  Still, there is something about her character that is going to have to be wrapped up.  In office politics, when you tip your hand prematurely about knowing too much information, it makes people start to wonder.

Well, that's all this muggle can conjure up for now.  I guess, like the rest of us, we'll all have to wait until Midnight on July 21st to find out what the heck happens to wrap up the series.  Wands at the ready, folks!

Is Z or Isn't Z?

A couple of weeks ago, I noticed that my Technorati authority took a dive.  At first, I was curious what could be causing a monumental backward slide in what had previously be trending upward.  Then I remembered:  Last December was when the Z List made the rounds.

But now, the 180 day expiration date has come and gone.  Sigh.  In a world where some things expire before they even get to experience their full life cycle, it can be a little daunting to keep up.  Sure, we talk about planned obsolescence, but (despite Technorati's attempts to the contrary), blogospheric relationships don't become obsolete.

Even since this list first came out, I've met so many more great people:

Robert Hruzek
Hunter Arnold
Dawud Miracle
Derrick Sorles
Adam Steen
Thomas Clifford
Lorelle VanFossen
Claire Celsi
Connie Reece
Kevin Brady
Mitch Matthews
Lisa Gates
Josh Nankivel
Jane Greer
Drew McLellan
Tom Haskins

...just to name a few.  So, what are you doing to keep your blogospheric relationships alive and well and prevent them from becoming obsolete?  What about your day to day relationships?

But now, the 180 day expiration date has come and gone.  Sigh.  In a world where some things expire before they even get to experience their full life cycle, it can be a little daunting to keep up.  Sure, we talk about planned obsolescence, but (despite Technorati's attempts to the contrary), blogospheric relationships don't become obsolete.

Even since this list first came out, I've met so many more great people:

Robert Hruzek
Hunter Arnold
Dawud Miracle
Derrick Sorles
Adam Steen
Thomas Clifford
Lorelle VanFossen
Claire Celsi
Connie Reece
Kevin Brady
Mitch Matthews
Lisa Gates
Josh Nankivel
Jane Greer
Drew McLellan
Tom Haskins

...just to name a few.  So, what are you doing to keep your blogospheric relationships alive and well and prevent them from becoming obsolete?  What about your day to day relationships?

Da PM Bone's Connected To Da Sponsor Bone

I once served as a project manager on a project-from-hell-with-no-chance-of-survival.  It had chewed up and spit out many project managers over the numerous years of it's existence, and I assumed the latest in a long line of what made the middle ages British Monarchy look like a natural and peaceful transition of power.

My first clue that something was really wrong was when I started to document and communicate that most natural of all infrastructure activities:  The project organizational chart.  In every other project I've managed, assembling and communicating the project org chart is a non-event; it's a one day activity where most people look at where they are on the chart and then smile and nod (saluting is optional).  This dysfunctional crowd groused about it for three weeks, went behind my back, positioned, preened, and pouted.  It wasn't an unreasonable chart... I had divided up the responsibilities and duties according to what made sense by scope.  What surprised me was that senior management had allowed these petulent children to get away with these behaviors for this long.

Building an org chart for your project is a pretty simple and straightforward (yet very necessary) exercise.  Here are just a few simple ideas to help it run more smoothly (as it had for me in every other project but one):

• Make sure every one is listed who will touch your project.  That heightens the accountability and prevents resources from slipping through the cracks.
• Group people logically by function or phase, using your project plan as your guide.  If you can't see an alignment between your project plan and your org chart, that's a red flag.
• Let people know what it means to report to somebody on a project org chart... how much authority is given to your "project boss" to direct subordinates' activity.
• Be careful not to overload any one individual's span of control.  Projects are tough enough without having to hunt down a cast of thousands.
• Get stakeholder buy-in from the sponsor team and the team leads (those reporting directly to the PM) and deal with dissidents quickly.

And if you ignore or avoid creating a solid project org chart?  Well, the following should be helpful at describing how your project will operate:

Captain and To Kneal

The other night during my management class at Drake, we had a rather fascinating discussion about motivation.  We talked about all of the content and process theories... Maslow's Hierarchy, of course... and McGregor's Theory X and Theory Y... one of my personal favorites, Adams' Equity Theory.  And we talked about David McClelland's Needs Theory.  McClelland's theory has fascinated me because he breaks down professional needs into three categories:  Need for Achievement (hmmm, an accomplishment-related consultant writing about achievement... go figure), a Need for Affiliation (or Affection, depending upon which publication you're reading), and a Need for Power.  Ah yes... Power.

One of my students mentioned that, while working with new hires, she'd given one of them a title of "Captain something or other" (I can't remember the exact wording) and put him in charge of checking on a specific aspect of the work of the other new hires.  His need for power was especially high, and the title allowed him to exert some authority over his peers.  We all know that power in the wrong hands (and heads) can be a dangerous motivational carrot... sort of an "enter at your own risk" thing.  My first job trainer/mentor/supervisor right out of college did everything but make me kneal before approaching... that was definitely a case of power gone awry.  But in the situation my student described, it does appear to work.

Probably the most fascinating discussion of the night came from a question that I've posed of my students since I began teaching this class:  After looking at all of the theories and the realities of everything we've observed about motivation, does it really exist?  Or is motivation simply a manipulation of expectations and perceptions to achieve a desired end?  My students always have fun answering that question and justifying their answers.

How about you?  What do you think?

Image from www.despair.com

Taxing Our Memory

In my quest to discuss and dissect office politics, normally I attempt to stay away from government politics, especially local government politics.  However, this one is just too applicable to pass up.

The local leaders-that-be think that a 1-cent additional local option sales tax is going to be the answer to all of our woes.  They've sold this Project Density (correction:  Project Destiny) idea as something that will build infranstructure, create jobs, lower property taxes, do your mowing, whiten your teeth, and turn Des Moines into Mayberry.  OK, OK, so I exaggerated a little on those last few.  Regardless, they're asking voters here in a tri-county area to give them permission on July 10 to take more of our money.

Back in 1999, the county leaders attempted (multiple times before it finally passed) to add a 1-cent local option sales tax just to help schools.  Our schools are crumbling, they cried.  Help the children, they pleaded.  If you love all that is good and right about our budding future then you'll say yes to this tax, they implored.  The voters put it in back in 1999.  Within a few years of the tax, a few schools had been rebuilt or repaired, but there just wasn't enough money.  They'd still need to close schools (going against a promise made to "sell" the tax to the masses).  It just hadn't yielded the revenue they thought it might.  I always liked what my economics professor in college said, "Taxes should never be used to raise revenue (because they won't).  Taxes only should be used to alter behavior (because that's what they do)."

Case in point:  Why do so many people flock to stores the first weekend in August on back-to-school-no-sales-tax-weekend?  If you've noticed, many of the stores do not run any ad specials that weekend.  Why should they?  The sheep... um... er... lemings... uh... I mean... people with money think they're getting a good deal getting 6% off instead of the 20-25% off they'd get with an advertised sale.  Those who think this tax is a good idea, the lower income brackets, are actually being hurt the worst.  As this Register Article points out, sales taxes are regressive and hurt the lowest tax brackets the most.  There are so many reasons to shoot down "Say Yes To Destiny"... from a logical data-driven point of view.

My biggest reason for voting no still goes back to 1999.  Local officials made promises and didn't follow through.  Now they're trying to sell another bottle of snake oil to the public.  I'm not buying it.  Neither are 61% of the most likely voters.

So how does this relate to office politics?  It's simple:  watch what you promise/offer to people.  They're watching AND they're keeping score.  I've had promises made to me that weren't kept.  I've had offers extended to me that were reneged upon.  The promises and offers created only temporary and minor setbacks in the grand scheme of my career and my life... mere speedbumps really.  The real damage was done to the credibility of those who made the offers and promises.  I learned quickly that their integrity wasn't worth as much as they thought it was, and everything they've said after that was strained through the "crap filter."  So... Don't dangle promotions.  Don't promise raises.  Don't offer new opportunities.  Don't.  Don't.  Don't.  Not unless you know you can deliver.

Otherwise... when you really need it... you may find your constituents voting no.

Image from www.gapingvoid.com

Friday Factum

It was great to see Mike Sansone back among the living this morning at the Central Iowa Blogga Nostra gathering at Panera.  Of course, he received all of the necessary attention he deserved.  (Mike, don't ever scare us like that again... we need you around for a long, long time!)

For those who can make it, tonight is my book signing at Beaverdale Books in Des Moines from 6-8 PM.  Would love to see you there.

I continue to have lots of fun posting for Iowabiz.com and for Office-Politics.com.  You can check out some of my additional posts from beyond the realm of Carpe Factum.  I may be adding even more writing assignments on other blogs in the near future.  Stay tuned.

Have a great weekend!

My First Podcast!!!!

I was very honored to be interviewed by Sherry Borzo of dsmBuzz on her show, Entrepreneur People, on Blog Talk Radio today.

It was fun to chat with her.  She's a great dynamo with an amazing vision.  Thanks for the enjoyable time, Sherry!

(Now, maybe Phil will stop teasing me about being "podcast impaired.")

Hanging In Effigy... And Other Coping Strategies

In this morning's paper, John Carlson wrote an interesting piece about the Belmond, Iowa class of 1957.  It seems they had a very nasty principal at their school, and he made their lives "a living hell" (in their words).  So, with the help of a few trusted teachers who felt the same way about their principal, they hanged a dummy from a tree in the school yard, complete with physical features that made it very clear who the target of their animosity was.

Keep in mind, this was back in 1957... a time when kids behaved themselves (wink, wink, snicker, grin).  But even 50 years later, the surviving members of the class are still bitter.  It seems this guy really pushed their buttons whenever and however possible... he was a real jerk.

Now, this blog has covered issues surrounding bullies and nasty people in power in the past.  In my writings for Office-Politics.com, I've provided people with strategies and ideas for dealing with them.  There are times when you can deal with these people directly.  However, some times you just have to endure the nasty people for a time.  What kinds of coping strategies can you employ until the problem goes away?

During one excruciatingly tough project with a very challenging and charm-impaired CIO, the project team implemented the "Rectal Rocket" trophy.  It was a huge bottle rocket that was presented on a weekly basis to the individual who had received the worst verbal reaming that week.  It resided in my office more than I care to admit.

Another coping strategy that a friend once shared with me is called "Roommates in Hell" - you imagine the individual you'd like to see the jerk stuck with throughout eternity.  Granted, theologians every where are probably cringing at this suggestion, but the mental detour has gotten me through a couple of difficult meetings with challenging people.

One student once told me that his team wrote job descriptions for the "hit man" they wanted to hire to eliminate the difficult individual.  A pastor once shared with me that he would write the obituary of hard-to-love parishioners.  I guess there's more than one way of handling this issue, ranging from morbid to downright humorous.

So now I'm curious... what coping strategies do you use to pass the time when you have to deal with a jerk you can't eliminate?