Life's A Fitch: A Lesson in the Birds and the Bees

Today, it is man against nature.

This week, robins followed the number one rule of real estate (Location! Location! Location!) and believed the top of my garage door opener would be the optimal spot to go condo. The problem with their logic is I like my garage door opener in working order, and I do not want bird poop on my cars IN the garage. Hence, I shut the garage door when they were gone, checked to ensure no eggs had been laid, and promptly dismantled their home renovation project. And they came back. And I dismantled. And they came back. And I dismantled. They don't seem to be getting the fact I don't want them.

Concurrently, bees have been making a home near my daughters' swingset in the back yard. Now I'm well aware of the bee crisis, but with a swingset out of commission, my kids might do the unthinkable: stay indoors and bury their heads in electronic devices. Against my ecological best judgment, I went to Home Depot to purchase spray to evict the bees. The clerk seemed aghast I would consider doing such a thing. She suggested I contact a bee keeper to find the hive and eradicate the bees naturally.

"Do you have the name of a local bee keeper?" I asked.

"Well, no," was her response.

"If I give you my address, will you do the phone research and call around and find one and get them there tomorrow?" I countered.

"I can't do that, sir."

"I'll take the spray."

She shrugged as I grabbed two cans and skulked off toward the cash register.

To top off my week, I've been appalled by Abercrombie & Fitch's CEO Michael Jeffies' comments about marketing to skinny people only. As the father of two growing young women, I go out of my way to impress upon them that their identity is not about body image, and that beauty is more on the inside than the outside.

But then I started connecting the dots. Michael and I are both guilty of excluding a group who want to be part of our "club." The difference is, the birds and the bees operate under instinct; humans operate with feelings and emotions. And the birds and the bees don't have money to spend on rent; people have money to spend on clothing.

There will always be "target markets" in business. Conversely, there will always be "undesirable customers." We'll never be rid of the difficult client whose calls go unanswered and whose emails sit dormant because we just don't have the energy to deal with them. (Don't gasp; you know you do it, too.) The taboo "birds and bees" of business marketing is you NEVER specifically call out those you are excluding. In project management, we list our stakeholders, but we never say, "Oh, yeah, we're NOT doing this project for those bean counters and pencil pushers in Accounting." Your accomplishments will always get further in the positive. If your business is going to "reproduce," ignoring the birds and the bees will be a huge mistake. Acknowledge them. Deal with them. Give them alternatives. But (and I say this with experience of one who has now been chased by both birds and bees in one week) don't piss them off. I'm grateful Mother Nature doesn't have a Twitter account.

One solution would have been to pump that hideously toxic Abercrombie & Fitch "fragrance" all over the garage and the swingset, thereby killing the entire environment for a 50-mile radius.

Alas...

The robins have now found an alternative spot on my property for their nest. They can stay there. And I'll probably call around for bee keepers next week, even though I don't have time. After all, I'd like to think I'm at least one step ahead of Michael Jeffries.

My Hero(es)

“A leader’s greatest obligation is to make possible an environment … where people can aspire to change the world.” - Carly Fiorina, Former CEO of HP

One question I field frequently - both individually and often in QA sessions with students or other audiences - is "Who are your heroes?" I need to apologize to past audiences as I've dodged the question notoriously, giving very weak answers. But that question keeps haunting me, not so much from audiences nowadays, but from the recesses of my own brain. So much so that I decided it was time to really sit down and define who some of my heroes are.

• Amy is one of my heroes. When her uninsured friend, John, needed surgery in the face of cancer, Amy rallied her friends, his friends, and an entire network to raise over $100,000 in just 37 days.
• Kevin and Shelley are my heroes. Ignoring logic and common sense, they followed their faith-filled hearts to adopt a little girl from half-way around the world. This little girl had a congenital heart condition, but not only did that not deter them. It only made them more determined to give this girl a loving home.
• Rod is a hero. When his wife, Michelle, was diagnosed with cancer, Rod used his amazing data skills to track her numbers all the way through her treatment, keeping his wicked sense of humor intact the entire journey. He stayed by her side until her battle was finished. While the love story didn't have the happy ending for which he and his family and friends hoped, his unwaivering dedication inspired many.
• Speaking of cancer warriors, Sarah is a hero. I met her through Twitter during my mom's cancer battle (amazing whom you can meet with the hashtag #cancersucks). She has championed her son's battle with cancer, while inspiring others through her blog and other charitable acts for the community.
• Janet is another hero. A freak motorcycle accident forced a leg amputation last year. Now, if I thought Janet was one tough lady before the accident, she raised the bar freakishly high with her determination, independence and positive attitude through her amazing rehabilitation.
• Ever think of creating a global not-for-profit WHEN YOU WERE IN 8TH GRADE??? That's what makes Jessica a hero. When she's not dedicating her time to children from other countries (or in her own community), she's willing to trek to another state to speak (dynamically) to other kids for a day about their own global impacts.

These are just a few. Most of them probably had no idea I felt this way about them (shame on me for not being more vocal before now). None of them have ever been hoisted on their team's shoulders to receive a championship trophy. They've never walked the red carpet to deliver an acceptance speech. Papparazzi have never chased them for a tabloid exclusive. They don't fly or wear capes.

Why then, are they heroes? Simple. They changed the world. Maybe not the "big W" in all cases but in changing their own world (small w), they invited us to watch their challenges, to observe their journey, to share their victories, and to learn from their setbacks. And their actions, their attitudes, and their accomplishments created a ripple effect. Those of us in the periphery caught a glimpse of greatness. Each of these people would argue with me that they only did what needed to be done. I'm sure one or two, when they read this, will scold me for putting them on a pedestal. (There's really not one tall enough or grand enough for their accomplishments, in my opinion.)

In light of all the talk of the Boston police's heroic actions from last week (law enforcement is always a default setting on my hero meter, by the way), I think it's important for us to think about it today: who are your real heroes? And why? Are they changing the world? Are you?

Hack School Project Management

Take 11 minutes and watch this video...

 

It's refreshing to see a kid like Logan communicate so eloquently. Having taught graduate school for 12 years and consulted for over 20 years, I can honestly say most of the adults I meet can't articulate what they want to be when they grow up.

I've pretty much figured out that being a contented accomplisher is my calling in life. Sometimes this takes the form of speaker; other times it's being an author. But at my core, I'm always a project manager. And as a project manager, I've figured intuitively how to be "hack school" over the years. Logan's description of hack school is spot on:

Hackers are innovators, hackers are people who challenge and change the systems to make them work differently, to make them work better, it’s just how they think, it’s a mindset...

I take advantage of opportunities in my community, and through a network of my friends and family. I take advantage of opportunities to experience what I’m learning, and I’m not afraid to look for shortcuts or hacks to get a better faster result. It’s like a remix or a mash-up of learning. It’s flexible, opportunistic, and it never loses sight of making happy, healthy and creativity a priority.

Once, I was brought onto a client because a person wanted to learn from me as I managed a major project for her organization. A couple of months into my contract, this individual took a seven-week online project management class. Voila... the class turned her into an instant "expert" in project management. She started taking glee in pointing out all the things I didn't do according to her instructor and text book. The problem with her approach was that I was actually getting results by doing things my way. I knew how to do things "by the book" but the difference between knowledge and wisdom is knowing when drop the book. (Purely unrelated, I'm thinking of switching physicians... do you know anybody who completed medical school in seven weeks online?)

A few years ago, Dr. Delaney Kirk sent me an article about the main reason fire fighters die when working on wild fires: When surrounded by flames, they focus too much on saving their tools and equipment and not enough on just running to save their own lives. That really sums up my project management "hack school" mindset. I love tools, by the way. A great project plan can save months and dollars to an organization. A well-written status report can bring critical issues to light. Issues logs cut through office politics. I love tools, but I don't rely on them. What I rely on is the ability to accomplish a successful end result.

So what about you? Are you more "by the book" or "hack school"? How can you start dropping your tools? Who knows? By doing so, you might just grow up to be happy and healthy.

Young and Hungry

I'm at a crossroads with our current house. We've done almost everything to it we possibly can, but should we decide to stay in this house long-term, there are a couple more projects we'd like to tackle. The question isn't really about the projects, but more about who would do the work. We've used one contractor fairly consistently over the past 10 years, but I think we're moving on.

Why?

Well, he's no longer "young and hungry."

When we first used him, he was just starting out and was very eager to prove himself in the dog-eat-dog world of contracting. And he did. Which was why we kept inviting him back for more projects. Sunroom. Bathroom. Kitchen. But by the time he reached our basement, things had changed. He was successful. He no longer did (or even directly supervised) a lot of the work himself. He used more subcontractors. And things important to me were missed. And he acted like we - his customers - were more of an inconvenience by merely asking questions. And while the final product was... well... just okay, it wasn't the level of work that made us love what he did and compelled us to keep inviting him back.

It's that way in the white-collar business world as well. I once subcontracted to a consulting firm that was young and hungry. I was one of their first recruits. Those first couple of years were stressful yet exhiliarating. We worked our tails off to prove ourselves as a viable consulting firm. The owner and founder worked even harder to match up projects with the skills and strengths of the consultants. We got larger and more successful. And then he turned over the operations to a salesperson. So much for "care and feeding" of the consultants. At that point, we were treated more like mental prostitutes as the emphasis went from "young and hungry" to "established and self-satisfied."

Young and hungry is a mindset. Young and hungry abdicates lazy satisfaction. Young and hungry celebrates a job well-done, and then turns around and looks for ways to raise the bar. Young and hungry stays in training to become better, faster, stronger, more agile. Last month, Fast Company released its annual list of the 50 most innovative companies. It was interesting who wasn't on the list: Facebook and Twitter. Ubiquitous? Yes. Young and hungry? Not so much.

Young and hungry is not about ego. In proving itself, young and hungry lets the accomplishment trump the personality. We'll let Kim Jong Un stay in North Korea, thank you very much. We have enough little dictators invading our cubicles already. Young and hungry is not autocratic. It doesn't need to be. Young and hungry doesn't backstab or steal credit. Young and hungry doesn't need to issue hollow ultimatums to get its way; young and hungry sets out a compelling vision. Young and hungry invites others along on the journey and attempts to keep them engaged as long as they want to be part of that journey. Young and hungry doesn't delegate; it rolls up its sleeves and welcomes the work.

So where do you fall on the scale? Are you still young and hungry? What will get you back there?

What Part of "NO" Don't You Understand?

It's been an interesting few months... that's an understatement. A lot of things culminated last week, giving me some much anticipated (and highly needed) down time to catch my breath and catch up on life.

And I've been taking advantage of it. Bill paying, paperwork, taxes, laundry (yes, Chief Accomplishment Officers do their own laundry), and some house cleaning have been my task list this week. Oh, and blogging.

One of my favorite quotes is "The Quality of our YESes is determined by the Quantity of our NOs." I'll admit I've had hard time finding the origin of this quote and web searches have yielded little. I originally thought it belonged to the late Stephen R. Covey, but now I'm not so sure. Maybe I picked it up from a random speaker or sermon from years ago. Regardless, it's stuck with me. And the past several months, blogging has fallen into my "NO" category.

But I started realizing how much I missed it. There have been so many things that have happened in the past year that have warranted a passing "Oh, I should blog about that," but then my other pressing YESes took over. And you want to know what? I'm good with it. Sure, I probably need to start over building a readership, but I think I can figure out how to do it.

So bear with me. I have a lot to say. About current events (and past events and future events). About accomplishment and leadership. About project management and people. About branding and behavior. About me. About you.

We have a lot of catching up to do as I move from "no" back to "yes."

Linkin' Lincoln

Over the holiday break, my wife and I ventured to the theater to catch a showing of Lincoln. First, I have to say it's great to FINALLY have children who are old enough to allow my wife and me to start enjoying movies again (at least ones that don't involve an animated princess of some sort). Second, my wife knows me well enough to sell me on these kinds of films before we go, and she didn't disappoint. She convinced me this movie would provide some great parallels to office politics. Finally, the movie was well made, and I predict many oscar nominations across the board.

But back to the office politics connection. Many of my clients are put in positions of selling ideas - BIG ideas - to their organizations. Sometimes there is popularity and support across the board. Other times, it's a mixed bag. Often, they are faced with a mountain of opposition.

The office politics lessons and affirmations abounded, and this movie reaffirmed why Lincoln's legacy as a leader continues to live on:

1. Timing is everything - while many thought it best to hold off on such a vote, Lincoln looked at the big picture and saw potential failure in waiting until the war was over. Many often confuse assumed urgency with real urgency. Ask yourself what's driving the need for your accomplishment before rearranging others' priorities.
2. Watch the message - Representative Thaddeus Stevens understood this when publicly cornered over his views on slavery and racial equality. Sometimes we can say what we really mean and other times we have to temper it in order for our accomplishments to succeed. Walking that fine line between truth and success is tricky.
3. Divide and conquer - Approaching all the lame duck Democrats at once would have resulted in failure, so William Seward orchestrated persuasive tactics one at a time. In order to sell others on our accomplishments, it can be useful to approach opponents when nobody else is around to derail the efforts... and in such a way that there is something in it for them.
4. Watch the home front - both Lincoln's wife and son provided plenty of distraction for him throughout the film. Often when dealing with political issues, we become so entrenched that we let other things slide. Remain mindful of EVERYTHING going on around you, even if you can't take action on it at that moment.
5. Keep calm and carry on - only once or twice did the character of Lincoln have to raise his voice in this movie, and those times were generally with his allies. All others saw the humble lawyer from Illinois. People generally respect a voice of reason over a Chicken Little-esque squawk. Be careful on your delivery in highly emotional situations.

All in all, it was a couple of hours well spent in the theater. And it was easy to see why Abraham Lincoln still holds our attention 150 years later.

Curtains!

"Hush, my dear," he said. "Don't speak so loud, or you will be overheard--and I should be ruined. I'm supposed to be a Great Wizard."

"And aren't you?" she asked.

"Not a bit of it, my dear; I'm just a common man."

"You're more than that," said the Scarecrow, in a grieved tone; "you're a humbug."

"Exactly so!" declared the little man, rubbing his hands together as if it pleased him. "I am a humbug."

-Excerpt from The Wizard of Oz by L. Frank Baum

Those of us familiar with the movie are familiar with the "Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain line. We've all known people who pose to be one thing but are exposed later to be something else. As a project manager and as a consultant, I've seen my fair share of "humbugs" posing to be wizards. 

Often, we get blindsided by the fact that there was a curtain in the first place. In the role of office politicians, our job is to identify when and where curtains exist between the "image" and the "reality." It's generally not that hard to expose if one knows what to look for:

1. How does the person in question treat others who are not present? More than one co-worker has exposed their curtain by "taking me into their confidence" by bad-mouthing others on day one. That's a huge warning sign that the snake will rear his/her ugly head against me some day.
2. How does this person's behavior change in the presence of those whose organizational power and influence is higher or lower than theirs? People without curtains tend to treat people consistently regardless of organizational position.
3. What exterior signals does this person give to draw attention to themselves? Note that there's a difference between a strong personal brand (e.g., wearing a bow tie every day) and drawing attention to a $2,000 suit.
4. How does this person behave in meetings? Are they interested and engaged in what other people have to say? Are they late? Leave early?
5. Do they verbally draw attention to their own press? I knew a law enforcement officer who rose high in the ranks who talked about his own ethics all the time. His behavior soon negated his own press releases.
6. Do they change their behavior during or after a conflict? Once corrected or reprimanded, are they grateful or resentful of the feedback?

These are just a few of the "curtains" to look for to determine whether the "wizard" in your life is really hiding a humbug behind the curtain. The ability to identify this is key in both human relations and branding. What are you doing to identify and pull back the curtain before it's too late?

They're Coming To Get You...

It's Halloween night and I'm home writing a blog post. No costume. No party. No November 1st regrets.

I've been thinking a lot about zombies recently. No, that's not a reflection on my current client or current group of students... probably just the "spirit of the holidays," as it were.

Of course, the benchmark for zombie flicks is "Night of the Living Dead." The great thing about horror movies is, if it's good enough, they'll do a remake. George Romero's 1968 flick was the ground-breaker, but the 1990 remake has its merits, too. Both start out with brother and sister visiting a cemetery, only to be accosted by zombies. Johnny, the obnoxious brother, is the first to reanimate to the walking dead, after taunting his sister Barbra (spelled Barbara for the 1990 version) with "They're coming to get you." Ah, the irony. (OK, now I'm getting hungry for Zombie Burger.)

Here's the interesting divergence in the two movies (SPOILER ALERT). In both Barb(a)ra hides with a group in a farm house until the bitter end. In the 1968 version, though, Barbra is a catatonic victim, drifting through the film up to the point of becoming the final undead buffet. The 1990 Barbara won't stand for that. She takes charge and takes names, and is the only farmhouse survivor.

For those of us who have to dwell among the "Working Dead," we get to see zombies in their most real form. A few years ago, I went to work as a contractor for a company where I had been employed for many years. After being out among the living for so long, I realized how zombified the organization really was. Most who were there were like the 1968 Barbra, fatefully awaiting their acclimation to the other zombies. I, on the other hand, after seeing their grotesque dysfunctionality, likened myself to the 1990 Barbara and engineered my exit (letting them think it was their idea - zombies are pretty easy to trick).

How do you approach the zombies around you? Do you just shrug and accept your fate of becoming one of them, or do you fight for your own personal survival, "leaving the farmhouse" if necessary to seek safer ground away from the undead?

If you're faced with a workplace of the undead and you've not yet joined them, what are you doing to plan your escape? Better think fast. We'll hope you survive till "morning."

The Summer Reading Assignment

“It is invariably saddening to look through new eyes at things upon which you have expended your own powers of adjustment.” F. Scott Fitzgerald in The Great Gatsby

I knew my wife was right. I really needed to just hunker down and do it. At first, I gritted my teeth and stared at it from across the table. If a book could taunt a person, this one was thumbing its nose and sticking out its tongue at me. I wasn't to be bested by an inanimate object. So I grabbed it and started reading.

I have a confession to make: for the most part, I have avoided "great literature" all my life. I'm an avid reader, mind you, but my interests fall mainly with business books. I enjoy the occasional bout with fiction. However, in my almost 46 years on the planet, I had averted many of the big names unless unavoidable as curriculum in a required class. Both in high school and in college, lit instructors had a nasty reputation of "Read this and then tell me what I think it means or get a bad grade." Those who know me best know that I have never liked being told what to think. So good grade or bad, I wasn't about to "play the game." Hence, my reading stayed with business books and whatever else tripped my trigger.

That's almost unconsciable to a high school literature teacher, and through whatever twist of fate, that is the profession I married. Instead of going off to the East Coast to learn about the lives of the Transcendentalists or the writings of Ben Franklin, she decided to make ME her summer professional development project. She gave me The Great Gatsby, and the only condition she stipulated was we would discuss it when I was done.

So I picked it up. I had heard her talk about on numerous occasions as she taught it, so I had the most general of ideas of the plot and characters (the same tip of the iceberg understanding I'd developed about many of the greats I'd never read). I had never seen any of the prior movie releases either, so I couldn't cheat (nor would I).

A few nights later, around 11 PM, I closed the book.

"Well?"

I didn't let her down. I told her I thought it was rather presumptive that most people thought the eyeglass billboard of Dr. Eckleburg was the omniscient yet detached god watching over the characters, when it was clearly Nick Carroway himself playing that role - narrating, judging, positioning, observing - yet never really intervening until it was too late. I countered that Meyer Wolfsheim was his satanic counterpart,  who set up Gatsby during his lifetime in a counterfeit house of cards yet stated he didn't have use for the man after he was dead. I talked about looking up what the name Myrtle meant, and finding out it was an evergreen bough that was actually a symbol of love in mythology. Perfect for the woman who was "ever green" - vibrant among the Valley of the Ashes, yet was merely a symbol of love for both Tom and her husband. I agreed with the obvious assessment that Daisy, more than any other character, was the villainess, yet no character was really likeable.

"You should have been a lit instructor," she enthused, thrilled that I had taken so much away from my first foray in many years.

I countered: "No, I'm still not overly 'fond' of literature yet. And the only people who read Gatsby these days are English teachers who have read it a zillion times before and literature students who are generally too young to really understand human nature. I'm seeing it through the fresh eyes of a 45-year-old's life experiences."

And thus we get to the crux of this post: Who's reviewing your accomplishments? Are you giving them to the old and jaded of your own profession to look over and provide the same stale feedback from their commoditized ilk? Or are your accomplishments being judged by the young and inexperienced, performing it only as a function of duty?

Or are you seeking out that sweet spot combination of fresh eyes AND valuable outside experience?

Accomplishing great things is only part of the equation; finding the right people to give you the best feedback is the rest of the equation. A few years ago, I quit active networking with other project managers. (Don't worry, I still count some of them among my best friends.) I just decided that we all spoke the same language already. I started hanging out with marketing and branding and public relations people. I hung out with social media geeks and technologists and musicians and fitness hounds. And I learned from them. I learned about them. I learned with them. But the most valuable thing is I learned what they could teach me about what I thought I already knew.

And that was one assignment I'm glad I undertook.

Flipping the Birds

The other night, I was at my older daughter's honor choir concert. While they were singing the folk song, "Risseldy Rosseldy," I felt myself getting uneasy, like I needed to look over my shoulder. Being an office politics consultant, I allow myself a healthy degree of paranoia, but this overwhelming urge at a music concert was odd. Then it hit me: this was the song the children were singing in the background during the iconic playground scene in Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds."

If you've never seen the movie, shame on you. Hitchcock builds suspense like few can, and this movie is no exception. In the scene in question, Tippi Hedren's character, Melanie Daniels, is sitting outside the schoolhouse waiting to talk to the teacher and check on the well-being of the children after numerous bird attacks in the area. The children are inside singing a very repetitive song, the chorus being sung sweetly and innocently over and over again. Behind Melanie, birds are gathering on the playground equipment while she, impatient and oblivious, sits with her back to the impending danger. You, the spectator, want to scream, "WOULD YOU JUST TURN AROUND!?!?!?!"

In my career, I've seen a similar scenario played out often. I see individuals or departments who are sitting on the bench getting agitated, while doom flocks behind them just out of sight. Of course, they have the power to turn around and see the danger for what it is, but they're too absorbed in their own little "here and now." So they sit. And they wait. And they ignore.

What are some of the flocks gathering behind them?

• Processes - Out-of-control processes seem to compound themselves. If a new input, like a novice employee or a software conversion, is introduced, it brings the flawed processes to light. However, most people tend to blame the new input for the problems rather than placing blame where it lies.
• Toxic Employees - Amazing what one or two really toxic people can do to a workplace and how quickly their cancer can spread to others if left unchecked. Management may relegate it to a "coaching opportunity" or an "HR issue" but it doesn't make the morale improve for those who have to endure.
• Policies and Procedures - I admire companies who have very small, finite sets of policies and procedures. They're able to hire bright, self-governing individuals who don't need a lot of direction. However, other companies weigh their otherwise high-performing employees down with ridiculous rules written to govern a select few who should just be fired.
• Behavior - It's hard to look in the mirror sometimes and see how your own behaviors, decisions, and performance may be flocking together to undo all the good you think you've done in your career. Looking at the three above is relatively easy by comparison. It's somebody else's fault. This is one where a good self-reflection can prevent you from getting pecked to death when you least expect it.

Some people assume they are safe exactly where they are. They never feel the need to turn around. So... before it's too late, are you willing and able to turn around?

Underlying Assumptions

Recently, a former student posted on Facebook, asking that her friends share our pet peeves. As a moderate Republican, I commented that my pet peeve was "when people assume that ALL Republicans are anti-environment, anti-education, anti-people, pro-Christian-right, and pro-greed." I was surprised when another of her friends responded by saying that his pet peeve was "When Republicans lie and say they aren't anti-environment, anti-education, anti-people, pro-Christian-right, and pro-greed."

I have to admit, I was fairly incensed. After all, this individual didn't know me as a person, didn't bother to learn anything about me. He had it in his mind that ALL Republicans were just one way. Evidently, it's still politically correct to stereotype and bash Republicans. I was even more irritated this was an employee at the university where I teach... and he probably didn't realize he'd just defamed a faculty member online. My final point of irritation was he was a person of color who had, I'm guessing, probably been the victim of stereotyping himself at some point in his life; evidently embracing diversity only went one way in his mind.

But, like all who stereotype and label, he was operating on a foundation of very strong underlying assumptions. First, every Republican he's encountered in his life must have fallen into his preconceived framework. Second, anyone who did not fall into those underlying assumptions must be lying.

Underlying assumptions are tricky things. They really do affect our behaviors in so many of our daily transactions. If you assume somebody on your team is lazy or incompetent, you may be inclined to go behind their back, second-guess their work, or start micromanaging them. If you assume somebody is out to get you, you may start to build walls. If you assume somebody has supported you on issues in the past, they will support you on upcoming issues.

How do you over come a severe case of underlying assumptions?

1. For starters, call them out. When somebody makes a strong statement like "Bob couldn't handle that assignment," simply note that seems like a very strong statement to have made about Bob.
2. Next, get at the assumptions themselves. What do you believe to be true about Bob that makes you think he can't handle the assignment? (Note, this is best done in a one-on-one format rather than in a meeting forum.)
3. How did you arrive at those assumptions? What behaviors did Bob display? (Focus on tangible behaviors or statements, not hearsay or innuendo.) Did the offending party read the behaviors correctly? Was there a pattern of behavior or simply a one-time activity? Did you provide Bob with feedback regarding the behaviors when you saw them?
4. Can you refute the assumptions if they are not valid? Can you give the assignment to Bob, make him aware of the assumptions, and then set him up for success?

Another element in this discussion is trust. If trust is absent in the relationship, assumptions can run rampant much more easily. Since I have no personal or business relationship with this Republican-bashing friend-of-a-friend, I'll probably just let him wallow in his ignorance.

So... what assumptions are you carrying about others? What underlying assumptions have others made about you?

Another great resource on this topic is the book, Leadership and Self-Deception, by the Arbinger Institute. This quick read does a great job of demonstrating how and why we put boxes around other people (and ourselves) and arrive at the assumptions we do.

Oh, You Better Watch Out

What does Santa Claus look like?

Well, no "good" boys or girls really know for certain since they're in bed asleep when jolly ol' St. Nick leaves toys under the tree. Worldwide, there are numerous images of Kris Kringle, but here in the USA, we have adopted the image of the rubenesque elf in red. And for this, we have Thomas Nast to thank.

Huh?

Who is Thomas Nast?

Those not familiar with American History may not recognize the name, but he was a 19th Century editorial cartoonist famous for exposing some of the worst political corruption of the late 1800's. He is also the one responsible for our image of the GOP as an elephant and the democrats as a donkey.

But we're talking about Santa Claus here. Mr. Nast drew upon his European roots to create his version of Santa. And it stuck. So the image that we now have is thanks to his keen imagery.

How often do we let others' define our perceptions of reality? Be it political beliefs, religious beliefs, organizational culture beliefs, relational beliefs, or accomplishment beliefs, are YOU in control of what you believe to be true, or have you blindly accepted what OTHERS have told you is reality?

We've let Thomas Nast define our reality of Santa for 150 years. My guess is there are many who think Santa has ALWAYS looked that way since his inception. And we've done the same for our other perceptions of reality as well. Unless you turn off Fox News/MSNBC, open your own Bible, review company your policies, read and review current literature, read opposing viewpoints, etc., you will ALWAYS see things the way you've always seen them.

I was talking with someone recently who did not want to work with another person because they "had heard" they were difficult. I happened to know the other person rather well and knew how the perception had been perpetuated. Hence, I began peppering my conversation-mate with questions about HOW they arrived at this perception. They had heard it from one other person... one, mind you... but had never worked or even met the "offending party" themselves. No research. Pretty sad that they were willing to discount someone based on one other's commentary.

So the best gift you can give yourself this Christmas season is the gift of an open mind. Learn to challenge your own perceptions of reality and define your own Santa.

'Twas the Month Before Caucus

It's such a charming, age-old story: right before a major holiday event, the little know-it-all mousy man writes an editorial that does not represent the masses well but certainly infuriates and discourages them. Parental figure gently chastises little mousy man, chiding him that he thinks he knows everything but he doesn't. Audience waits for happy ending when the holiday event is restored and all is forgiven. (OK, that last part only occurs on television.)

Straight out of a Rankin-Bass cartoon, I've been enjoying the drama that's unfolded over "professor" Stephen Bloom recently. His recent article in the Atlantic paints Iowans in a most unfavorable light of broad strokes of stereotyping and bad research, most unbecoming a so-called "intellectual" of his presumed caliber. (So glad he's an employee of our "dismally crime-infested" state.)

University of Iowa President Sally Mason (in the role of Father Mouse) tries to save Christmas... er... caucus... (um... the reputation of her university) through some damage control. The local tshirt shop has had a field day with the ridicule (Merry Christmas, Raygun... little Stevie figured your Romney "corporations are people, too" sales were growing thin, so he gave you a gift for the holidays).

After 45 years here, I can say with certainty that Iowa is a quirky place full of contradiction and paradox. I both love it passionately and blame it for my hair loss. It and its people amuse and befuddle me. But unlike Bloom, I see the potential and beauty and brilliance of this state and its people. I consider myself fairly well traveled, and I think it says a lot for the state of Iowa that I always look forward to returning home. Also, unlike Bloom, when I make a comment about another person or group of people, I can take responsibility and ownership for my actions and words and not act suprised if others are offended, hurt, or angry. Methinks that somebody has spent too much time in his own little ivory tower. We'll see if "Father Mouse" (President Mason) suggests an early retirement as a way to "fix the clock."

Bottom Line: Communication is not a hard concept... unless you're a certain journalism professor at the University of Iowa.

Guess Who's Thumbing the Winner?

Sigh.

I like to maintain a baseline level of confidence in society.

I like to think that people - at their core - have qualities that benefit others.

I like to believe that all bosses are inherently good... kind of like Luke Skywalker believed there was still good in Darth Vader.

The problem is that Luke Skywalker was right.

This story comes from Eastern Iowa. William Ernst, owner of the QC Mart chain, decided to make a game of firing employees. A judge ruled against him on his little game, stating that he created a hostile work environment, for releasing this memo last spring:

New Contest – Guess The Next Cashier Who Will Be Fired!!!

To win our game, write on a piece of paper the name of the next cashier you believe will be fired. Write their name [the person who will be fired], today's date, today's time, and your name. Seal it in an envelope and give it to the manager to put in my envelope.

"Here's how the game will work: We are doubling our secret-shopper efforts, and your store will be visited during the day and at night several times a week. Secret shoppers will be looking for cashiers wearing a hat, talking on a cell phone, not wearing a QC Mart shirt, having someone hanging around/behind the counter, and/or a personal car parked by the pumps after 7 p.m., among other things.

"If the name in your envelope has the right answer, you will win $10 CASH. Only one winner per firing unless there are multiple right answers with the exact same name, date, and time. Once we fire the person, we will open all the envelopes, award the prize, and start the contest again.

"And no fair picking Mike Miller from (the Rockingham Road store). He was fired at around 11:30 a.m. today for wearing a hat and talking on his cell phone. Good luck!!!!!!!!!!"

(Poor Mike Miller of the Rockingham Road Store.)

One of the questions I generally field as an office politics advisor is: "What happens when it's the boss/leader/owner/authority figure who is exhibiting the bad behavior?"

My answer is generally the same: YOU are still in control of your reaction. YOU can choose to leave. YOU can choose to talk back. YOU can choose not to engage. Or, in their case, YOU can choose to hire a lawyer and fight. Yes, there are consequences to YOUR actions, but the empowering thing is... they're YOUR actions.

We had a situation at a soccer game a couple of weeks back. A child was obviously injured on the field (and this is not my first rodeo, folks... I know the difference between a "shake it off" injury and a "everybody grab a knee" injury). The parents were trying to call the ref's attention to the injured child, and instead of stopping the game to check on her welfare, he opted for yelling at the parents, screaming at him that he knew the rules, and antagonizing instead of managing the situation. Worse yet was the league's decision to side with him without doing adequate investigation into the matter. The parents did what they could; they backed down to his irrational behavior at the game and then reported the referee to the league afterwards. Will this ref ever have a bearing on their lives long-term? No. He was just a man who cared more about his injured ego than an injured child. But the bottom line is this: the parents took the actions that were within their power.

I've dealt with many a bad boss in the course of my career. Nowadays such a person is just fodder for future writing. Nevertheless, it's taken time to learn how to finesse the situation when in the heat of battle. I congratulate those convenience store employees for taking decisive action against their boss. It took courage, no doubt. We'll hope he can learn from the situation.

Remember: when dealing with an ill-minded and/or ill-behaving authority figure, YOU are still in control of YOUR reactions. Never, EVER forget that.

Waving "Buy-Buy" to Change

Recently, in my commute to my client site, I thought I was seeing double. As one Best Buy store was being shelled out to make way for a new Whole Foods Market (my gastro side is giddy beyond belief), a new Best Buy store was being built right next store. What initially looked like a redundant marketing campaign was actually bridging a potential gap for electronics-seeking consumers.

Right now, I'm in the midst of managing a major software conversion for my client. They have the old software, and my job is to get them to new software. We're approaching this change like the dual-Best-Buy approach, but I don't have the luxury of making an obvious sign that points the users to one system one day and another system the next. That's where change management principles come into play.

• First, my team and I have to assure the end users that when we switch over, they'll have a quality product. We have to build creditiblity through our testing to give them the best we can. Unlike a Best Buy shopper who can buy his or her latest iDrool at one property or another and know it will work equally well, we have to earn that assurance.
• Second, we have to answer the never ending question of "What's In It For Me?" (WIIFM)  Unlike Best Buy customers, they don't have the option to shop elsewhere during construction. Still, they want to know how their professional lives will be affected. It's my job to make sure those messages go out.
• Third, we have to bring them along on the journey. Where as passersby got to see one Best Buy sign go up and then the old one come down, my stakeholders will rely on me to tell them where we are in our journey and answer the age old question, "Are we there yet"?

Stephen Warrilow wrote a great piece on resistance to change about a year ago. Slightly different emphases but some great thoughts nonetheless.

The bottom line on change is how you as the change leader bridge the gap from the present to the future. Seizing the accomplishment means more than just hitting all of your milestones and staying within budget; it also means bringing the right stakeholders along for the ride.

Unraveled

A couple of years ago, I bought a pair of Ahnu mesh shoes to knock around by the pool and the beach. I needed something that could get wet and hold up to summer wear. They took a while to break in, but last summer, I wore them all the time to the pool. I went to get them out for this summer's pool time fun only to find that the mesh had unraveled on one of them. Sigh. So much for that... guess I'll be going back to Merrell or Keen for some good summer footwear.

To be fair, I don't know how the shoe's mesh became unraveled. Was it a flaw in the fabric or the craftsmanship? Did something happen to them over the winter? Was I rougher on them than I thought? (After all, those suburban swimming pools are jungles fraught with peril.)

I've been watching a lot of unraveling going on the past several months. Charlie Sheen, Anthony Weiner, Arnold Schwarzenegger, John Edwards.

Todd Spangler had an article in this morning's paper entitled, "What were they thinking?" In it, he addresses this very thing:

Some psychologists say narcissism leads politicians to stray; others cite a personality type prone to risk taking and attention seeking. Whatever it is, the outcome is as powerful -- and as salacious -- as ever, with calls for Weiner, a U.S. Democratic congressman from New York, to resign after he acknowledged that he sent graphic photos to women he knew on social media Web sites.

"It's risk taking," said Frank Farley, a psychology professor at Temple University. "We want bold leadership; we don't want a timid wallflower in these positions. The thing is, there are two sides to risk taking, and the negative side is where you do things and, in a sense, you can't stop yourself."

I might suggest something else: accomplishment deficit disorder. I find that when people are focused on an accomplishment (at least, a significant one that benefits those beyond himself or herself), doing things they shouldn't generally is rarely an issue. When the accomplishments laid before us are lackluster, boring, or insignificant, we go looking for things to fill the void.

In the past few months, I've seen some local colleagues also become unraveled, and I'd guess (ultimately) it was for the same reason.

What do you think? Is it a personal issue or did these (ahem, cough) "gentlemen" just not have enough to keep them busy on really important things? And where does personal accountability fit in with accomplishment? Just some thoughts as we start a new work week.

Nothing to Fear? Let's Find Something!

“If the instructions are not clear, if the orders are not obeyed, it is the fault of the general. But if the instructions are clear and the soldiers still do not obey, it is the fault of their officers.” – Sun Tzu

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." - President Franklin Delano Roosevelt

"Whenever there is fear, you will get wrong figures." - W. Edwards Deming

"We make up horrors to help us cope with the real ones." - Stephen King

I've come to the conclusion that fear is underrated. I'm not talking horror (a la Stephen King), nor unbridled neuroses (as a project manager, I have that one mastered, thank you very much). I'm talking good old run-of-the-mill, healthy-for-you FEAR.

I was reading the story of Sun Tzu and the King's concubines.  For those not familiar with it, Sun Tzu was a kind of consulting legend. Instead of Six Sigma, he specialized in military strategy... a sort of Machiavelli for the B.C. era. King Ho Lu was considering hiring Sun Tzu, so he asked for a demonstration (evidently, round table interviews hadn't been invented yet). Sun Tzu organized the king's 300 concubines into two battalions (allow the king's two favorites to be the heads), armed them, and gave them a clear, direct order. Giggling. He tried again. More giggling.

Here's where things get interesting. He called in the executioner and beheaded the two favorite concubines. Sun Tzu himself might have been on the chopping block had it not been for what he did next. He quickly promoted two more concubines and gave them orders. Amazingly, compliance.

A while back, I was on a contract with a client. There were some project managers who weren't cutting it, and the client manager did what needed to be done: promptly fired the project managers (be they contract or employee... didn't matter). However, there were business analysts who were also misbehaving who were allowed to continue the behavior. Why? There was no fear of reprisal. Nobody wanted to behead a concubine. Those in the project office got the message loud and clear: do your job and nobody gets hurt. In the business analyst office, that message rarely got around.

I've been curious why we don't behead more concubines. Mind you, I'm not talking about the toxic bosses who go around doing nothing BUT verbal decapitations all day. My focus here is on otherwise effective leaders who let bad behavior abound. I think the problem here is how we perceive fear. Roosevelt was right: we have nothing to fear but fear itself. The question remains, though: isn't it just a little OK to maintain a healthy respect for being afraid? Have we become so desensitized to fear that we just don't know how to feel it any more?

If you are in a role of leading people out there among my readers, what is preventing you from beheading a concubine? Is it a desire to be liked? Is it a need for honesty (as in the Deming quote, above)? I think even Deming would have agreed that well-directed fear is a good thing. Fear of the competition. Fear of complacency. Fear of irreversible failure. Fear of irrelevance. Fear of under-performing co-workers. Fear of non-value. Those are all good fears to have. They are good fears to address head on.

So, the next time you deal with a giggling lack of response in the face of clear directives, are you prepared to behead a concubine? It might make all the difference in seizing your accomplishment.

Advocacy

One of the things I've learned through the years of dealing with cancer (my parents and my own) is the importance of having a strong advocate.  A cancer patient can be on considerable medications, and chemo/radiation can knock even the strongest on their tail-end for days/weeks/months.

Right now, my sister and I are serving as Mom's advocates.  There's not a day that goes by where we're not talking, comparing notes, making plans, or discussing options.  (NOTE: this sometimes irritates our mother, who is notoriously independent and strong, but we've learned to be very open and honest with her in our communications.)  Having people in your corner who can ask tough questions of an oncologist, who can fight with insurance companies, who can keep track of the number of drugs or medications - well, this is an important team to have.  Sometimes it takes having multiple pairs of ears in the room to fully absorb what the doctor is telling us.  We've often started our post-consultation debriefs with "Did you hear the same thing I heard?"  Then we pick apart the most important parts of the message and start over again with more plans and action items.

Moreover, even advocates need advocates.  I have been BEYOND blessed to have so many people in my life offer to help with all kinds of things.  We have back-ups for watching our girls.  We have people who have offered to bring us meals.  We have people with whom we can just share a good cry or a primal scream of frustration.  During a recent rough bout, when I was not having a good night dealing with the overwhelming nature of everything, my 11-year-old daughter came into our bedroom and informed me that if I ever needed a shoulder to cry on, she was pretty good at crying, too, when she was sad and would be there for me.  The best advocates can be those who have gone through it already.  I know a lot of people who have gone through the loss of a parent in the past few months.  Even the best of intentions cannot replace "I get it; I've been there."

Advocates also have to be there as constant encouragement to the patient.  We're their cheerleaders, advisors, surrogate worriers, mouthpiece, earpiece, and hand-holder.  Karen Putz, who has always been one of my favorite bloggers, tweeted me with a great article about cancer.  There are so many forms that cancer advocacy can take.

But this line of thought leads me back to my "day job" - when you are trying to seize the accomplishment, who are your advocates?  As my cop friends would say, who has your back?  And equally important, for whom are you serving as advocate?  Whom are you helping to seize their accomplishment?  In our society of "lone wolf" and "rugged individualist" mindsets, we forget that life's accomplishments (at least the ones worth accomplishing) are team sports.

Australia vs. The Time-Out Chair

 I was having lunch with friends the other day, and they started asking my advice on some chronically bad behavior at their company.  They were complaining that dysfunctionality was running rampant in their organization, and were wondering what they could do about it.

I asked them one simple question:  "How do your executives act?"

The response was as I expected.  Terms such as "childish" and "distrustful" and "conniving" were thrown about.  It was simple cause-and-effect.  The employees misbehave BECAUSE the executives misbehave.  A while back, I was asked to respond to a letter on Office-Politics.com where the top three executives were having affairs.  I suggested to the letter writer that he may want to consider a career change because their behaviors would eventually filter throughout the company.

It's pretty easy if one person misbehaves.  In school or at daycare or at home, you have a time-out chair to help correct the errant child.  (Some children spend more time on the chair than anywhere else.)  However, a couple of centuries ago, Britain decided they needed a whole island to deal with their less-than-stellar citizens, so Australia was colonized as a prison.  (Now people vacation there; go figure.)  So it is with some organizations.  If you have one or two bad employees, it's fairly easy to deal with them the traditional ways: coaching, counseling, corrective action.  If the whole lot are acting like a werewolf convention during a full-moon, then you have a problem with the overall culture.

The diagnosis of the systems output is simple.  However, the cure can be more challenging (but not impossible).  If enough people (namely executives), decide they want to change the culture (think Seattle's world famous fish market), then anything is possible.  With the Fish! example, the decision to change had to come from the top man himself, and then he had to make good by modeling the behaviors he wanted to see.

Where do you see yourself fitting into this organization?  Are you prepared to tackle an entire culture?  Some battles you can win, but some wars are costly.

There are no easy answers, but it certainly gives you something to think about if you're in an organization where you dread getting up in the morning.

Nailing The Dismount

Even in a bad job market, people evidently still have their dignity.

After all, one can only put up with a bad job, bad coworkers, and/or bad boss so long before one gets really fed up and says "Screw it!!!"  I'm always bewildered by those who write into Office-Politics.com and have put up with a bad work situation for (drum roll) YEARS and wonder how they can make it better.  (It's called a "recurring pattern of behavior," Bucky... sloooowly step away from the employer.)

I've been amused by two stories that have made the news in the past couple of days.  The first is Steven Slater of Jet Blue who got fed up with a passenger's disobedience, delivered a rant via the PA, grabbed some beer, and high-tailed it down the inflatable slide.  The second is Jenny, who got fed up with her bad boss, and resigned via photos to her coworkers (in the process exposing her boss's Farmville addiction)... although I'm not sure how credible the latter story is, but it is hilarious nonetheless.

"Take this job and shove it!" never sounded so good... well, except for poor Steven who is now behind bars for his antics.  Everyone has had a bad work situation from time to time.  As I talked about yesterday, office bullies sometimes run rampant and unchecked.  Some executives are utterly clueless.  Silly rules of bureaucracy befuddle otherwise intelligent and rational individuals.

Still, your stint at a particular employer (or client, in my case) is a system.  And your departure is the final piece of output.  Losing it on the dismount is never a good thing... unless you are attempting a triple-quadruple-3/4-rotating-back-front-rotating-vertical-gravity-defying-death-cheating-Holy-Mary-mother-of-God-did-we-really-just-see-that flip.  Then a less than perfect landing might be expected.  I've had clients where I've left less than gracefully (but I've done it with my head held high for what I attempted to do while I was there), and I've dismounted some projects with a style and grace that would leave Shawn Johnson with her mouth gaping.  How you depart is up to you.  But be prepared to deal with the perceptions of others... that feedback loop can be like landing on concrete without padding if you're not careful.

Gazing Into McChrystal Ball

(Alternatively titled: "A Rolling Stone gathers no boss" OR "Flat Stanley travels to Washington")  

General Stanley McChrystal learned a hard lesson about workplace behavior.  No matter how incompetent you think your boss is, you don't vent your ill will to a public source.  Recently, there was an article in the Des Moines Register about some locals who had lost their job because of Facebook.  I've had situations before where clients thought I was writing about them in my blog.  I assured them that while they may see themselves in the pages, I have a policy about not writing anything critical about an active client (besides, I have MANY past clients who provide me with ample fodder).

Sometimes, people think they are justified in bad-mouthing the boss.  In this soft-economy era, there are more and more stories about employers who have abused the relationship with their employees.  I know of one recently dismissed individual who could easily and justifiably go to the media to blow the whistle on his boss' inappropriate and unprofessional behavior, but he refuses... bad-mouthing the boss just comes back to haunt you.

Granted, I've broken this rule myself throughout my career.  And I've paid for it.  And I've learned from it.  I'm fortunate now that I can be selective in my project choices, and I've learned to tell good client managers from bad client managers through the interview process.

So if you think YOUR boss is a complete schmoe, just remember what poor ol' Stanley is going through this week.  Then watch yourself before you let your inside voice play outside.

Yacht-A Yacht-A Yacht-A

 So Tony Hayward wants his "life back."

So the pressures of cleaning up BP's disastrous oil spill is too much for him to handle.

So he goes to a prestigious yacht race to cheer on ol' Bob (the name of his yacht).

Big deal... who cares?

Um... well... it would appear... A LOT OF PEOPLE.

On office politics, appearances mean everything.  Arms crossed.  Disengaging in a meeting.  Going to lunch with somebody.  Leaving early.  Arriving late.  Laughing at a joke.  People are paying attention to what you do.  For some of you, you may not care what other people think.  (For the most part, I'm right there with you.)  But, like it or not, we do have to be concerned about perceptions.  If they go unchecked, perceptions can become fact.  And facts can ruin careers.

You don't have to be obsessing about others' opinions every minute of every day.  All I'm saying is to watch out for the ammo you give their perception arsenal.

Here We Go Loop-De-Loo

Recently, I've been observing a lot of real-life "labs" in Consequence 101.  People I know have been receiving feedback on their past actions.  For some of them, their actions have been occurring for months and years.  But luck ran out, fate caught up, and consequence won out.

I'm not going to pass judgment on these individuals or on their actions.  But it is a good lesson in systems thinking when it's applied to human behavior.  I've talked about systems thinking a ton over the past couple of years.  Most of the time, it has been in the context of organizations and accomplishment.  However, systems thinking applies equally well to how people act.

I love to watch people, and I especially love to watch people reacting to other people.  I was recently in a meeting where a professional was passionately trying to get his point across.  He was coming across somewhat abrasively, and the body language around the room told me this was not the first exchange where this individual overstepped his bounds.  Postures stiffened; facial expressions became defensive; responses were curt.  But this individual was missing a vital piece of the feedback loop.  And so his output (behavior) became an input for the inevitable next exchange sometime in the future.

The feedback loop of systems thinking is highly consistent.  You can occasionally trick it with a rogue input, and the system will forgive you.  But if you keep pushing the system with bad inputs, the feedback loop does catch up, and when the system pushes back, it pushes back hard.  I've mentioned Peter Senge's Beer Game before.  When the retailer, wholesaler, and manufacturer see the patterns in the greater system, they realize how their bad decisions led to horrible consequences.

What about you?  Are your decisions and behaviors showing up in various feedback loops?  How are people responding to your actions and words?  When/how will the feedback loop catch up to you?  Can you reverse the trend of your behavioral system before it's too late?  Trust me, I've been on the receiving end of systems thinking feedback loop spanking.  It's easier just to pay attention to the system when it gives you a gentle nudge the first time.

How To Steal Your Boss's Job

Recently, I was approached by Fox News to be interviewed on an office politics segment, which they entitled "How to Steal your Boss's Job."  For logistical reasons, the interview fell through, but I've been thinking a lot about this topic since being approached.  Yes, the title is rather sensationalistic, but we've all come to expect that from various news outlets.

Regardless, in this economy, there are more than a few people who are scanning upward, hoping to unseat a barricading boss.  Hence, in the spirit of keeping office politics on the up-and-up, I'll share with you what I would have shared with the segment producer had the story gone through:

1. What do you want to be when you grow up?  Is the boss's position really the direction you want to go with your career?  Are you in the right field for your skills and passions?  I think it was Zig Ziglar who always used to admonish those who climbed the ladder of success only to find it was leaning against the wrong wall.
2. Be careful what you wish for.  Remember the movie, Bruce Almighty?  Talk about stealing the boss's job!  Bruce got to be God.  And he found out it was a heck of a lot harder to be the boss than he imagined (or criticized).  Sometimes being the boss isn't all it's cracked up to be.
3. There's an upside to Thievery.  Every company should be concerned about succession planning.  If you are skilled and qualified for your boss's job, you should make that known to your boss in a non-threatening way.  If something should happen to him or her, being groomed to fill in seamlessly is a plus in today's economy.
4. You are your boss's ad agency.  The best way to "steal" your boss's job is to get him or her promoted.  Be their marketer.  Make them look so darn good to their superiors that upward mobility is a foregone conclusion.  They should be so appreciative of your efforts, you will be a shoe-in as their replacement.  And remember:  a rising tide raises all ships.
5. You're all on the same team.  Each of my daughters plays soccer.  My older daughter's team plays well together, stealing the ball from the other team, while helping and defending each other.  My younger daughter's team is supposed to be 3-on-3.  It's actually 5-on-1, as whoever has the ball is attacked... sometimes by their own teammates... and it's chaos.  Who's team would you rather play on?
6. Don't lose it on the dismount.  Should you succeed your boss in his or her position, just remember what (and who) it took to get there.  And there's always another upstart who wants to play "king of the hill" - so watch how you behave when you get there.
7. And... should you have an incompetent boss who needs to be deposed... and you've tried every effort to coach them to be successful... quit enabling and protecting bad behaviors; their own incompetence will do them in.  Just don't help with the cover-up any longer unless it would endanger your company's livelihood (or other stakeholders such as customers).  If that is the case, document responsibilities so it will be clear where accountability truly lies.

Yeah, I know, not nearly as juicy-sounding as the way Fox wanted to spin it... but it does show you can play office politics AND keep your soul.  Go figure.

After Tax Deductions

Yesterday was "Tax Day" here in the United States.  And along with it came numerous "Tea Party" protests across the U.S.

Now say what you want to about the Tea Party, I sort of admire them.  Libertarians with attitude.  Statistically, they are educated and financially well off, dispelling the myth that they're a bunch of militant whackos.  Essentially, they want smaller government and less spending.  They transcend party-lines (because as we all saw during the Bush years, there was some record spending going on within the Republican party, so we can't blame all of the big spending on the Obama-Reid-Pelosi menage-a-trois).

The media likes to dismiss them as disgruntled.  They say "disgruntled" like it's a bad thing.  I personally enjoy those who are disgruntled, at least a little bit.  I tend to learn a thing or two from people who complain.  I learn what's wrong with the status quo.  I learn what doesn't work.  I learn WHO doesn't work.  I learn what's not fair and equitable.  I learn who's getting away with things they shouldn't be.  But most importantly, I learn to keep my eyes open to my surroundings at all times.  When you're a consultant, these are valuable lessons to learn early.  When the tea party has been taxed, they're pretty vocal, and you can deduce a lot of interesting conclusions from them.

Where is your cubicle tea party happening?  What can you learn from them? 

Street Cred

It's been a little quiet from me the past couple of weeks.  (Well, many of you were on spring break, so I doubt you missed me all that much... after all - tequila shots and warm breezes were calling.)

The past month has been fun for me.  As I mentioned in an earlier post, I'm now contracting full time as a project manager.  Yes, it is fun... this is the kind of stuff that gets my adrenaline going.

While the schedule has been an adjustment, the activity is just like riding a bicycle.  Project plans, status reports, meeting minutes, issues logs, risk management.  You never forget.

Some have asked me why I took a detour from the speaking and writing to go back to a full-time cubicle-dwelling contract for a few months.  (The reality is that it isn't much of a detour as I still have a speaking schedule, and I'm in talks about my next book, but I digress.)  The biggest reason I agreed to take on this contract can be summed up in two words:  "street cred."

It's the same reason a successful actor agrees to do an independent film at a reduced rate, or why an athlete will join in a pick-up game of ball.  As a project manager, I never want to get too far away from my roots.  I don't want my expertise to be academic.  As a Chief Accomplishment Officer, I'm wired to DO, to PERFORM, and to ACCOMPLISH.

So for a few months (as long as my client and I agree that I'm adding value to the project and to the organization), I'll stick around.  I'll share some knowledge.  I'll learn a few new tricks myself.  And more importantly, I'll maintain my street cred.

What are YOU doing to maintain your credibility in your field?

The Downhill

It's been interesting to watch thegrowing tension between Lindsey Vonn and Julia Mancuso.  It came to a head today when Vonn's crash interrupted Mancuso's first run.  But you could tell from the very first medal ceremony that the relationship between the two ran as cold as the wind on top of Whistler Mountain.  And now Mancuso claims the "popularity contest" is affecting performance.

Hmmm.

Really?

REALLY?

I know athletes are a quirky bunch and - while amazingly focused - can be thrown off kilter by even the smallest of things.

But here are two grown women who are creating an Olympic-sized controversy.

Nice fodder for the cameras... the news media... and, well, bloggers like me.

But I'd like to go a different route with this.  This blog is about accomplishment, and here I'd like to focus on the lack of accomplishment.  Have you ever noticed among people who chronically have trouble achieving their goals (not that a few gold and silver medals constitute a lack of accomplishment) tend to blame external forces for their failures?

Vonn seemed surprised by the accusation.  No shock there.  When people are accused of undermining the accomplishments of others, the first reaction generally is "Huh?"

Things can go in a few directions, but often it's all downhill from there.  And not just any downhill - the Combined-Super-G-Giant-Slalom of gravitational pull.  Why?  Because the other side gives credence to the accusation instead of blowing it off or ignoring it.

It will be interesting to see where this one goes.  Office politics on the slopes?  Maybe.  Kiss and make up.  Doubtful.

The next time somebody tries to pull you into their lack of accomplishment, take a step back, a deep breath, and give yourself time to consider the source and analyze the situation.  Because if you don't... trust me, that first turn-and-drop is a nasty one.

Marsha! Marsha! Marsha! Hits the Mark

It's been an interesting week watching a news story evolve over a customer service gaffe turned ugly here in Des Moines.  You can read the long version if you wish, but here is the shortened version:

A group of teachers are on lunch-break during an inservice day last Monday.  They decided to go to a local establishment downtown, where one of the teachers found a hair in her salad.  She pointed it out to her server, who responded sardonically, "Don't blame me. I didn't put it there." The manager was too busy to talk to her.  On the way out, she and the owner had a confrontation, which ended with the owner gesturing and screaming at her and her colleagues that he never wanted to see another teacher in his restaurant.  She sent an email that night to a few of her friends and colleagues detailing her ordeal.  Within 24 hours, the story had spread across Des Moines faster than a corndog virus at the State Fair.  The owner apologized, and the Operations Manager released a written statement providing reasons (excuses) why the owner behaved the way he did.

It's been a week since this happened.  The Facebook page boycotting Legends continues to grow.  People have taken sides.  Being married to a teacher, I heard in no uncertain terms about the solidarity of the profession.  To offend one teacher is to offend them all.  I've also heard the other side, which basically implies the teacher was being whiny and demanding.

However, a few important observations have been lacking in this battle.  Both sides have accomplished a lot.  Mark Rogers has alienated many in this town against him, but he's also galvanized a few of his supporters.  Marsha has galvanized even more supporters, but has also drawn some fire.

But here's what's missing:

1. What about the server? If you're going to hire a restaurant server, it seems that customer service 101 should be: "Oh, I'm terribly sorry. Let me get you a new salad right away." I would hope that server (who has conveniently remained nameless) is now jobless and looking for a position which does not require interaction with other living humans. The "middle man" who fired the first shot was allowed to slink into the shadows while two major forces arose in battle.  And in office politics conflicts, we see the instigator escape to wreak havoc another day. 
2. It boils down to communication. Mark Rogers claimed he tried to make Marsha Richards happy, but she wouldn't hear of it. She claimed in her email that she tried to keep him focused on the server's behavior but he just grew more belligerent. To quote Cool Hand Luke, "What we have here is a failure to communicate." When learning the basics of male/female communication (anyone who's been through couples sessions knows this one), you learn that SOMETIMES women do not want problems solved as much as they want to be heard, validated, and affirmed first and foremost. My guess (based on the sides of both parties) is that Mark tried to short-circuit this part of the communication loop and just wanted to solve the problem to make her go away WITHOUT LISTENING to her. And he learned it didn't work very well, got frustrated, and blew a gasket

In our quest to accomplish great things for ourselves and our organizations, sometimes the little details get lost.  We forget what the real issue is.  And we then go to battle.  And both sides are ill-prepared to win, because it becomes more about ego than engagement.  And no Facebook boycott page or press release from an operations manager will solve the root cause of what's really wrong.

Personally, I was never a big fan of Legends to begin with, so I doubt the teacher boycott will affect my dining decisions one way or another.  But as far as entertainment goes here in Des Moines, it's been a great week.

Past The Romance

Any blogger can write a gushy post on Valentine's Day.

It takes a "real man" to write about the day after.

Seriously, folks, we can talk about loving our jobs, our projects, and our accomplishments when "love is in the air" and everyone holds hands and sings at the end of the day.

But how do we feel the love when the romance is dead and all the happy gushy feelings are on the 75% off clearance shelf?

What do you do when the love is dead in our workplace?  Well, here are a few ideas:

• Ask why and how - what path did your work environment take to get here? Was it one toxic co-worker? Is it a bad policy? Did the project not make sense? Can you isolate the root cause(s) of the dissatisfaction?
• How long - has the current environment always existed? If not, how long did it take to go downhill? Was it overnight (it rarely is)? Can you still reverse the trend? (If so, see the bullet point above.)
• Control freak - do you and your colleagues have control over the culture and environment? Can you call a "come to Jesus" meeting, or is it the elephant in the room of which everyone is aware but nobody wants to discuss? If you can't fix it all, what steps are in your control? Will it take baby steps or a quantum leap?
• Feet to the fire - ally yourself with others who want change and hold each other accountable for the behavior shifts that need to occur. Set timelines and goals. Touch base and figure out where you're slipping.
• What have you done for me lately - there may be some who don't want you to succeed or who feel threatened. If you can demonstrate you are moving in the right direction, you can champion your own changes.
• Keep the romance alive - workplace changes are like marriage.  If you only wait until special occasions like retreats and appraisals (or anniversaries and birthdays), you will be in trouble.  Culture is a day-to-day personal branding decision.

Start feeling the love again... at least for the next 364 days.

Embrace Your Anti-Heroes

"Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it." - George Santayana

Submitted for your consideration:

• An academically elitist high school algebra teacher who would openly berate and mock students who struggled to grasp a concept
• A college religion professor who droned monotonously yet who, when questioned, would mark down the papers of those who did not fall lock step in line with his thinking
• A new supervisor who took sadistic pleasure in the downfall of others, who went to great strides to make life unbearably miserable for subordinates
• A Chief Information Officer who frequently blew up like Vesuvius at the smallest of issues, sparking direct fear from his underlings
• A Consulting Sales Executive who exhaled negativity like it was carbon dioxide, quick to kill ideas and dreams as inconsequential, and who would sabotage consultants perceived as "threatening"

These are some of my anti-heroes.  We all know heroes.  They're the ones we look up to, the ones we embrace, the ones we admire and emulate.  But we all have anti-heroes, too.  However, we tend to run from them, avoid them, ignore them, and dismiss them.

But should we?

As I grow older, I find comfort in thinking about my anti-heroes.  They no longer hold power over me as they did when I was in direct contact with them, but their influence on my life is still very strong today.  I remember the way their actions and words made me feel.  I remember the stings and barbs and the acute pain caused by them.  And these things make me a better person, because I know how NOT to act.

In leadership, we elevate a lot of heroes.  We herald strong leadership.  We boast of result-warriors.  And we write books and case studies about bad leaders in hopes that we never meet them.  Come on, people!  We've all experienced an anti-hero (or two or three or dozens).  And if we want to be the best, then we can no longer afford to ignore the worst.

I know what I need to do to be successful in my career, in my field, and in my life.  But as I keep my eye on the prize, I also want to make sure I observe the polar opposites of success, the antithesis of what I want to become as a teacher, a consultant, a writer, and a speaker.  And my anti-heroes help me with this goal.  Eventually, their actions have caught up with many of them, and they've experienced publicly embarrassing set-backs.  A few have yet to collide with karma.  But it'll happen.  It invariablly does.  But it's not my job to make it happen.  My job is to model the positive behaviors important in my life while avoiding the behaviors of my anti-heroes.

I'm grateful to my anti-heroes.  They've shaped me in many ways.  I'm definitely a better person because of them.  Who are your anti-heroes?  Are they still controlling your life in bad ways?  Or do you control your memories of them?  What are you learning from them?

Embrace your anti-heroes... but not too tightly... you may cut off the oxygen to their brains.

Work with People Who "Get" You

The past couple of weeks have been... well... distracting.  That much should have been obvious with the lack of original blog postings.  But most of you who read this blog know that I have been enjoying the ultimate masochism by finalizing two book projects this summer.

Race Through The Forest has been just that:  a race through the proverbial forest of the publishing world.  I've actually been working with two publishers on this project.  My original publisher, Tiberius, maintains the rights and handles all of the Amazon activity.  I made the decision to hire my current publisher, Lexicon, to reformat the book and make it look more like my other two for brand consistency.  But still, one would think the second edition and second printing of a book would be easier than the first.  Not so, my friend.

The project has come with the normal bumps and bruises, but I have to say I've been so impressed working with Catherine Staub and her team.  She has been a communication hub between me and the printer the past few days.  I always feel completely comfortable talking with her about any publishing-related issue.

I started processing why this was the case.  What makes Lexicon stand out?  (For the record, I really liked Tiberius, too, and the ONLY reason for the switch was geography.)  Even so, Des Moines is a publishing town.  We have historically held much talent in the field of creating literary tomes people want to read.  For Catherine and Lexicon, books are just one drop in a very diverse bucket of publications they produce.  They create everything from photographic layouts to corporate publications (all of the highest quality) and a lot of other things I would never guess.  The big reason for going with Lexicon time and time again is... well... they "get" me.

They understand what makes a project manager tick.  Catherine can read me like a book.  She knows when I'm in my gregarious and goofy mood, and she knows when I'm in my down-to-business mood.  She knows how to encourage and negotiate on the triple constraint of project management, and she knows when (and how) to tell me I'm not being realistic.  She knows how to tell me bad news.  She celebrates the victories along the way.  In short, she gets me.

Besides a shameless plug for my publisher (who deserves that and much more), this post is about YOU.  Do you work with people who "get" you?  Do you allow them to understand you and your needs?  Have you shared the difficult "come to Jesus" meetings with them?  In office politics, I sometimes advise people to play it safe and not reveal too much... at least in the beginning when trust levels are low.  However, there comes a point when the veil must be lifted.  Trust has to be built.  Emotional bridges are the foundation to Carpe Factum.  I know I don't work well with people I don't trust (and I've seen plenty of them in my career).  But when the trust level is present and the communication is zipping along... watch out, world!

Big thanks to both Lexicon and Tiberius for a great project completion.

WUHOT ... NOT

Originally Published March 2006

I "accidentally" stumbled over a new acronym when I wrote my book on project management.  I'm making it my mission to make it part of the American vernacular.  The term is WUHOT, and it stands for "Walks Upright, Has Opposable Thumbs" - you know, your basic run-of-the-mill biped.  A primate who navigates (barely) on two legs, preferably without dragging the knuckles.  We're not asking this person to create, to lead, or (God Forbid!!!) to think.  And so this person doesn't.  He or she survives and endures in the world of corporate lingo, not having been deselected by the evolution of organizations.

In Race Through The Forest, my WUHOT has a name:  Reece S'Orce.  Ha!  Can't pull anything over on you... you got that word play right away.  In their generic terms, those breathing assets on our team are called resources.  Especially harsh is to call them head count.  Not humans.  Not people.  Not mothers, fathers, wives, husbands, sons, daughters, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, nieces or nephews.  Certainly not dreamers, aspirers, creators, doers, reachers, builders, makers, thinkers, or liaisons.  Nope.  Just resources.  We would not want to differentiate them in any way.  Sure, they may have skill sets, but we don't care.  Not in our own tidy world of making them fit into our project plan like a square peg into a round hole.  And we wonder why the only thing good we can say about them is that they "walk upright, have opposable thumbs."

If we are going to create Carpe Factum organizations, we'll need to find a way to get past the WUHOTs.  While they may not agree, firing them might be a good start.  If you think that is unduly harsh, you would provide the same courtesy to lunchmeat and salad dressing that had lived past their expiration dates.  Why not give the same consideration to people who are not useful to your organization?  Most WUHOTs are not evil by nature.  Just misunderstood.  Zombies in a field of people who probably fit better into their jobs, cultures, and environments.  Some are victims of the Peter Principle.  Some are merely burnt out.  Some were promoted for all the wrong reasons.  Some were hired because of their relationships in the network.  Perhaps voting them off our corporate islands will force them to find a new reality.  One where they can shine... and dream... and accomplish.  Who is preventing your Carpe Factum?

Author's Footnote:  I'm pleased to announce that in the past three years, more and more people are accurately identifying the WUHOTs on their team by the proper term... and doing something about it.

Revisiting God's Little Chew Toy

Wow - what a month.  I've been juggling with curve balls this month, from car break-ins to health scares, and to be honest, I'm feeling a little exhausted.  I really didn't leave a lot of slack in my own personal system to deal with stuff beyond my normal go-go-go pace... which is my own fault.

One of my first blog posts was about dealing with God's Little Chew Toy... you know, the Eeyore of your team who always has multiple things going wrong all at once.  At the time I wrote it, I was dealing with two team-mates who seemed to have everything collapsing around them simultaneously.  The frustrating part was that neither was a great performer, so I was finding it hard to show them sympathy for the "excuses" for their lackluster performance.

But what happens when the "bad karma slump" hits YOU?  What happens when you are God's Little Chew Toy?  I found a great set of posts by Jonathan Keese Sr. about dealing with adversity.  He has some simple yet powerful lessons on handling the many curve balls that life throws at us.  I have a couple to add:

1. Laugh - find something, ANYTHING, that will make you laugh.  It's been proven that laughter is the best medicine.  Recently, I've been on a Phineas and Ferb kick.  I know the chuckles derived have helped me keep my head.
2. Help - do one good deed for somebody else.  Even if it's just paying for coffee at the drive up for the person behind you, you just never know when that one random act of kindness finds its way back to you.
3. Confide and share - my church small group and my circle of friends collectively rock!  I've been overwhelmed by the outpouring of support and encouragement... BECAUSE I ASKED.  That's not easy for me; I'm used to solving others' problems.  But the texts, Facebook messages, phone calls, etc. have been so uplifting.  Don't keep it bottled up.

4. Exercise - admittedly, I've done horribly at this one this past month, and I've felt it.  So this lesson was learned the hard way.  Back on the cardio, weights, and nutrition immediately.

A lot of people are still going through the effects of the bad economy, are looking for jobs, and are just trying to get a grip on some very tough realities.  We've known a few people who have filed for bankruptcy, and there are others who are just feeling the pain of difficult job hunts.  It's scary.  The bottom line:  it can and will get better.  I promise.

Maybe Verizon Should Handle Bailout Distributions

Which begs the question:  What suggestions do you have for getting your point across to irretrievably stupid people?

Are You an AC in a DC World?

My older daughter loves the Science Center of Iowa (and I love taking her there).  It always seems there is something new to talk about, to learn, to experiment, and to explore.  The last time we were there, we learned about Nikola Tesla.  He was a peer of Thomas Edison, although few people know about him.  His inventions were a bit ahead of their time, and as such, he was regarded as something of a mad scientist.  (They always make "mad scientest" sound like a bad thing... I don't get it.)

Anyway, in Edison's day, direct current (DC) was all the rage in electricity.  Why let that pesky electrical current go in more than one direction?  Why should it need to?  Well, Tesla thought it should, which created a parting of the ways between the two scientists (that, and the fact that Edison stiffed Tesla on his salary, but that's another blog post for another day).  Eventually, to prove his point, Tesla built a tower in Colorado Springs to demonstrate his point.  It was big and loud and scary... but it worked (more or less).  It was also subsequently dismantled since it frightened the locals.  Eventually, history proved Tesla right, and discovered safer ways of harnessing an electrical current that could go in more than one direction.  Still, when we think of electricity and light bulbs, Thomas Edison is the guy who gets all the credit since he didn't scare people.

The world has been full of "free thinkers" who are ahead of their time.  Sometimes, they are really ahead of their time, like Galileo.  Other times they may be just a little ahead of their time.  I was on a project a few years ago where I made some suggestions about requirements gathering which frightened the villagers... er...um... project team.  Of course, this same group had never heard the term "straw man" for creating a prototype or an early draft/iteration of a solution, either.  To my knowledge, it was years later before they made any real progress toward a solution, and according to my sources, it looked amazing like what I suggested when I was contracting with them.

What I learned from the experience is to never assume an audience is more mature (professionally, intellectually, or emotionally) than one thinks they should be.  Ask a lot of questions before making pronouncements about a solution.  Get the senior leaders on board so they can back you up.  Be prepared to prove your point in multiple ways.  Obtain supporters both inside and outside your project team.  Handle your detractors firmly yet politely (after all, those villagers with pitchforks and torches can really sting if you're not paying attention).  Be prepared to go back to the drawing board to reassess BOTH your solution and your approach for selling it.

Eventually, you'll have to make a decision to move forward or to scrap it.  Thinking through some of the issues above can mean life or death to a well-meaning project that's just a little ahead of its time.

When Bloggers Attack...

"If one does not understand a person, one tends to regard him as a fool." - Carl Jung

I'm bothered by something.  Even though I write for Iowabiz, I generally do not read it as carefully as I probably should... at least until this week.  Todd Razor wrote a great piece on a new marketing approach by Hubbell Realty here in town.  To help sell a new community of brownstones, they created a fictional character named Hailey Brownstone.  She has a Facebook page and a Twitter account.  She has videos on Youtube and a webpage.  There are disclaimers stating she is not real, although they may not be as obvious as some would like.

Drew McLellan and Andy Drish jumped on them for not being authentic and for trying to deceive customers.  Before weighing in, I talked to the Marketing Director at Hubbell Realty, who informed me this was their most effective ad campaign ever.  They've already sold two brownstones, one of their other communities wants Hubbell to create a Hailey character for them, they are on target for one of their best Decembers ever, and another realty company in town is already copying them with the creation of their own character.

After going back and forth with me and others on Iowabiz, Drew took the argument to his own site.  What happened next can best be described as the blogospheric equivalent of the carnivore attack on Wild Kingdom.  Most commenters viciously attacked Hubbell, simply based on the fact they didn't like the videos.  They weren't provided with the facts about how effective the approach has been.  Drew has yet to produce one Des Moines real estate customer who has actually felt deceived.  I've been surprised at who commented.  People like Connie Reece and Brad Shorr are those I not only respect, but genuinely like (and their comments were tame compared to most).  Except for Drew, most involved have no vested interest in Des Moines and have never heard of Hubbell Realty until now.  Yet it seems some have just jumped on the bandwagon because an opinion can be given without accountability.  Nothing illegal has been done in this marketing approach; people just want to criticize because they wouldn't have done it that way.

My question is, where is the blogospheric integrity?  I remember listening to Anita Bruzzese at SOBCon back in May, hearing her emphasize the importance of demonstrating a high level of journalistic integrity in our blogs and comments, checking our facts, and viewing all sides of an issue before commenting.  I'm not seeing this here.  In an era where the real estate market is tanking on all sides and our economy is generally shaky, I'm not inclined to attack a company for doing something successfully.  To do otherwise demonstrates the same lack of understanding demonstrated in the Jung quote above.  In my comments, I asked the question on Iowabiz whether social media could afford to reach the land of sacred cows.  In a world of Madoff, Blagojevich, and Big Three Bailouts, there are plenty of things that deserve our angst-ridden criticism.  A company successfully employing innovation isn't one of them.

I've been enjoying the essays of Peggy Noonan recently.  She's been talking a lot about the need for grace in our society.  At this season of Christmas, at this time when we need desperately to see the positive among a field of negativity, at the cusp of a new era of leadership and hope, I would think some of us should pause before we comment and think about what grace really means... to us personally and as a community.

What do you think?  Too much righteous indignation on my part?  Maybe.  I have no vested interest in Hubbell other than sharing a community with them.  I've had a couple of students from there, but I would probably feel the same way if Iowa Realty or JDR Group were being attacked.  I guess I'd like to know what YOU think.  Are they just registering an opinion, or did this one go too far?  Do we have a responsibility to our stakeholders to look at all sides of an issue before we blog or comment?  As always, I admit I may be wrong.  This one just isn't sitting well in my gut.  I guess I'm just feeling a little disappointed in some of my blogging compadres right now.  I'll get over it.  To do otherwise would be a lack of the same grace I've just been talking about.

Ya Better Watch Out...

Just in time for Christmas and Santa's naughty/nice list, Career Builder publishes the 10 worst employees of 2008.  It is quite a rogues' gallery this year.  At least it came out before Blago hit the headlines; he could take up all 10 spots single-handedly:

Worst employee No. 1: Marie Cooley, architect

The story: After seeing an ad in the paper for a job that sounded like hers, Cooley thought her company was planning to fire her. For revenge, she attempted to sabotage theJacksonville, Fla.-based business by destroying $2.5 million worth of computer files. Cooley told investigators she went into work over the weekend, got angry, disconnected internal power cables and deleted files from the server. She was arrested and charged with damaging computer equipment. (Source: News4Jax.com)

Worst employee No. 2: Charlena Graham, deputy coroner

The story: Graham,of Augusta, Ga., plead guilty to stealing $325 in gift cards from a deceased woman. Graham obtained the woman's personal belongings after her death; her family alerted authorities that the gift cards might be missing. Graham was sentenced to seven years probation. She was also ordered to pay back the $325 within 90 days and pay $5,000 in fines. (Source: NBC Augusta.)

Worst employees No. 3: William Vinyard, Christopher Stephens, Stacy Vining and George C. Phelps, firefighters and EMTs

The story: Four employees of the Marion County (Fla.) Emergency Medical Services Alliance were arrested and accused of grand theft for collecting pay upwards of $20,000 per person for hours they didn't work. A police news release stated that several part-time EMS paramedics were clocking in for each other, exchanging badges and not actually working the hours for which they were paid. All employees have resigned or been suspended without pay from their full-time jobs. (Source: The Star-Banner, Ocala, Fla.)

Worst employee No. 4: Judge Robert Restaino

The story: Restaino was hearing domestic violence cases in his Niagara Falls, N.Y., courtroom when a cell phone rang. After no one owned up to the phone, Restaino "snapped" and jailed all 46 people who were in the courtroom. New York's top court removed him as a city court judge, saying punishing innocent people is "inexcusable." (Source: Associated Press)

Worst employee No. 5: Karen Baer, teller supervisor

The story: In an FBI affidavit, Baer admitted to taking $10,000 at a time over several years from the Westminster, Md., bank where she worked as a teller. She told investigators that she used the money for vacations, bills and college tuition for her kids. She is facing federal embezzlement charges of more than $1 million. (Source: Baltimore News)

Worst employee No. 6: Jarrod Hankins, court bailiff

The story: Hankins forgot to remove a woman from a courthouse holding cell in northern Arkansas when he failed to contact the sheriff's office transport personnel to take the woman back to the county jail, according to officials. She spent four nights locked in a room without food, water or a toilet. Hankins was suspended for 30 days without pay.  (Source: 4029TV.com)

Worst employee No. 7: Robert Irvine, chef and TV personality

The story: Irvine embellished and fabricated the more impressive parts of his résumé, including claiming to have cooked for the British royal family; catering to four U.S. presidents; and helping to make Prince Charles and Princess Diana's wedding cake. His contract with the Food Network was terminated. (Source: St Petersburg (Fla.) Times)

Worst employee No. 8: Jamie Day, bartender

The story: Day was arrested after a patron at a bar in Alton, Ill., called police to complain that Day was bartending in her birthday suit. She was charged with misdemeanor lewd entertainment. The county suspended the tavern's liquor license for 30 days and fined the owner $500. (Source: Fox News)

Worst employee No. 9: Pythias Brown, transportation security agent

The story: Brown was allegedly stealing items from checked luggage in the back rooms of the airport in Newark, N.J., where he worked, making off with more than $200,000 worth of travelers' belongings. The stolen goods included a camera belonging to a CNN employee who found it for sale on eBay. Police discovered 66 cameras, 31 laptops, jewelry and more in Brown's home. (Source: Yahoo! Technology)

Worst employee No. 10: Patricia Villegas, beautician

The story: Villegas was convicted of giving two clients fake cosmetic injections, which resulted in facial disfigurement. The women paid $2,000 for what they were told were beauty enhancers using collagen and cortisone, but were actually similar to silicone. Villegas, of Flushing, N.Y.,  was found guilty of assault, reckless endangerment and scheme to defraud. She faces up to 14 years in prison.

I could contribute a few Des Moines workers onto this list, but I'll show some restraint.  After all, "he knows if you've been bad or good" anyway, so what more could I possibly add?

 

Thy Rod and His Staff...

I ran across a story on the web about dogs and how they experience envy if another dog is rewarded and they feel left out.  Of course, anyone who owns a dog (or is owned by a dog) is wondering why people were paid to perform a scientific study on this topic.  I'm on my third long-term canine relationship, and I could have saved the researchers a lot of time and money.

But who knew the principle applied to Illinois politicians?

I was dumbfounded, but Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich was found dumb.  Well, for all of you still wondering what to get that special someone for Christmas, I hear there's a senate seat for sale in Illinois.  He could have cut to the chase of all the wire tapping, joined the wave of social media, and put it on Craig's List.  After all, it's pretty bad when you get the finger wag of shame from the FBI... these guys don't get disgusted very often.

Every once in a while, you get the megalomaniac in the office, too.  Most of them get shown the door eventually when they self implode.  But for the few who hang on, Karma will catch up to them eventually.  Maybe that is the grander purpose of this economic downturn... purging the bad people from our workplaces.

It's gonna be an interesting winter, folks.

Car Pay D.M.

With my recent ordeal, I'm now driving a rental vehicle (which I like so much, it's actually made my final four selection for new cars).  The only problem is that I picked it up in KC and have to drop it off in Des Moines.  This means a drop off fee, which the insurance company doesn't cover (note to everybody out there negotiating auto insurance... make the insurance company cover drop off fees between cities).

This whole issue of logistics has been weighing on my mind recently, as I've contemplated every configuration to avoid paying the fee... not on affordability but more on principle.  But then again, it's had me applying those same thoughts to the workplace.  I've worked on many projects where there have been multiple geographic sites involved (some spread internationally).  One of the key issues in projects is communication - many would argue communication IS the key issue.  When you have a geographically dispersed workplace, how do you get information from point A to point B without undue stress and burden?

Communicating across a geographicaly dispersed project team does not have to be challenging:

• Bring them together - on one large program for a major financial services institution, executives paid to bring the project team together once a quarter.  It was a very expensive investment but well worth it.  While we were able to give face-to-face accounts to each other on our project process, the more important thing was the ability to have some face-to-face time.

• Just in Time - If you do bring people together physically, make sure there's a purpose and it happens at a strategic time for the project.  Bringing in an engineer when requirements planning is occurring or an executive for a key decision-making presentation are good examples of this principle.

• Build relationships - some small talk is OK over the conference calls as you wait for the invariable stragglers to join.  Learning about the weather, major news, or family activities of other team members strengthens the bonds.

• Create accountability - since you are dealing with people without seeing them, make sure your project tasks have been well defined and you can share with a high degree of confidence what constitutes "done" with your project activity.  Nothing kills credibility like somebody taking advantage of the geographic distance to hide their own lack of progress.

• Visit - while you may not be able to get the whole project team together, almost everyone can find it in their budget to send one or two people to visit various sites on occasion.

• Use technology - phone and video conferencing systems have come down in price.  For that matter, you can now do a lot right on your laptop.  Take advantage of these tools for those who are "visual learners" and need to see things rather than just hear them.

Now if anybody can figure out how to get a Nissan Altima from Des Moines to Kansas City (and get me from Kansas City to Des Moines) without inconveniencing too many other people, please let me know.

Mow-tivation

Returning from the paradise splendor of O'ahu, I found a thick blanket of leaves on my back lawn.  Well, it is autumn, after all.  Still, I find myself groaning this time of year (and have every November since we moved into this house).  I'm not groaning because of the need to mulch and bag the leaves with my mower; I'm groaning because it is a weekly lesson in futility.

It seems like I no more than have all of the leaves collected in my yard over the weekend and out to the curb to be recycled as mulch on Monday morning, than the yard looks exactly the way it did before I touched a single leaf... usually within 48 hours.  Mowing up the leaves is a huge lesson in futility.  And it takes every ounce of motivation to tackle this task week after week for about five consecutive weeks.  (And for all of my environmental friends out there, please do not lecture me on using my mower to rake.  I'll reduce my carbon footprint in other ways, thank you.  If it still bothers you, you're more than welcome to hold a weekly raking party at my house whenever you want.)

We have high maintenance lawns at our work places, too.  They are called "co-workers who don't get it."  You can lecture them, coach them, threaten them, praise them, cajole them, and train them.  They always seem to go back to their old ways within 48 hours after a feedback event.  Some of you are in union shops where firing is almost unheard of.  Some of you are in companies where HR functions are non-existent.  Some of you just have wimpy bosses who won't take action.

Unlike my lawn (where the trees do EVENTUALLY run out of leaves), these co-workers seem to hang on forever.  How do I deal with them?

1. Document - write down the specifics of their behavior and what was done to correct it.  This is the number one reason why people are unable to remove the poorly behaving coworkers... no paper trail.
2. Demonstrate - you may be the reason for the bad behavior.  If they are a tactile learner and all you've done is tell them how to do something, they still may not get it because they need to do it first.  Make sure your approach matches their learning style.
3. Detail - be very clear about your expectations and what the end result looks like.  Often, we provide ambiguous terms and wonder why the outcome isn't what we really wanted.
4. Direct - sometimes people aren't following because you aren't there to lead.  Get out of your cubicle and be around to provide meaningful feedback.
5. Design - one reason for lack of follow-through is the co-worker wasn't allowed a say in the solution.  Let them help design the solution and you might be surprised how well they follow through... as opposed to just being told to do something.

Of course, it may be that they are just utterly clueless, a classic W.U.H.O.T. in a land of functioning human beings.  In that case, reassign them to something harmless and keep them out of the way of productive people until you can get rid of them.

Decision 2008: Casting Your Vote... FOR SOMETHING

I'm amazed and saddened by the number of people who are planning on staying home from the polls this year on Election Day.  While I can understand their rationale (neither candidate is all that great), we do have an obligation, a duty, and a responsibility to cast our vote.  It's a right which I cherish, even when neither choice is all that cherishable.

Today I'm going to the local library to cast my absentee ballot, since I will be on an airplane the better part of Election Day.  I would encourage everybody to get out and vote, and here's a little incentive.  If you don't like either candidate, don't think of the election as voting FOR either of them; vote AGAINST the one you least like.  Sometimes decisions are about selecting the lesser of evils (rather than just voting "present").  There has been considerable rhetoric from both parties that voting for their candidate is more patriotic.  Really, the only patriotic thing is the act of voting itself.

On another note, it's been interesting to see how many people are looking to the President to bail us out of the economic mess.  It's not the President's job (namely because the President really has very little control over the economy).  I look to the President to facilitate helping "Joe Six Pack" (Palin really needs to get a new phrase) to figure out a way out of his own economic mess without burdening him more.  Looking to the government (or your employer or your mommy) to solve YOUR problems is a dangerous mindset to take.  We founded and developed this country on the principles of personal accountability, and it concerns me to see how many people (from both parties) want their leader to solve it for them.  I'm voting for a leader who will let me solve it for me and those in my circle of influence; not solve it for me.

Finally, Kevin Eikenberry is running a remarkable survey about the presidential candidates.  I encourage you to take it.  Kevin is a remarkable guy, and I'm sure the survey will be very telling!

Remember:  You can't really "seize the accomplishment" if you don't make a decision to do so first.

When Bailouts Don't Make Sense

If you're looking the latest rhetorical wisdom about Wall Street and Congressional votes and financial bailouts... keep looking.

Yesterday, I was able to witness another type of failed bailout, but this was indisputably a good one.  I had taken my dog, Zorro, to our local PetSmart store to be groomed.  When I dropped him off, the groomer told me 4:00.  When I returned at 4:00, the groomer got testy with me and informed me that she had said "I SAID between 4:00 and 4:30."  OK, so much for customer service.  I went to pick up my children from daycare and school and returned at 4:40.  "I need 15 more minutes" was the curt response from the groomer.  When I pointed out that this was my second return and the second missed deadline, the groomer proceeded to scream at me from across the salon.  Thankfully, the other two groomers stepped in and quickly asked if I'd like to speak to a manager.  When he arrived, I explained the situation (having your own children around to watch you in these events is a good balance-check to make sure you don't get too irate).  When he heard that one of his employees actually screamed at a customer, he promptly refunded my money, and he informed me in no uncertain terms he would talk to the groomer about her behavior.  He was apologetic and polite.  Who knows?  I may actually give them another shot.

The problem with these situations occurs when a manager chooses to bail out a non-performing employee.  They'll make excuses for them.  They will defend their behaviors.  They'll do everything but make it right.  The PetSmart manager could give lessons on service recovery to some of the cubicle dwellers I've seen.  I've observed everything from non-performing project resources to ill-tempered CIO's to badly behaving company presidents get away with their antics for years.  Those who can make a decision turn a blind eye.

Here is how I choose to deal with the situation:

1. Look for patterns of behavior.  It's easy to dismiss one or two isolated occurrances, but when the behavior is consistently rearing its ugly head, those in a decision-making capacity cannot ignore the situation.
2. Document!  Save emails and minutes and performance appraisals... anything that puts the behavior in writing.
3. Bottom line analysis.  Robert Sutton, author of The No Asshole Rule, recommends calculating the TCA (or Total Cost of Assholes).  Show financially how much their bad behavior contributes to the bottom line through missed deadlines or the turnover of others.
4. Confront... strategically.  Allow higher-ups to see the behavior first-hand.  Create situations where the offending party's worst behaviors could demonstrate themselves for others.
5. Proceed with caution.  The poor performer is being protected for a reason.  You can't always get rid of them, but you don't want to destroy your own career in the process.  If you're really lucky, you may eventually eliminate both the poor performer and the boss protecting him or her.

Now I wonder if any of the above could be reasons why the Wall Street Bailout failed.

Home, Home on the Change

It's kind of interesting when God decides he's going to get my attention.  I always giggle about the cute devotionals that compare this event with a cool breeze or a gentle touch or a soft whisper.  After all, are we talking about the Almighty Creator of the Universe or an air freshening fabric softener?  Nope, with me, God pretty much goes full-court press, knock upside the head, "Yeah I'm talkin' to you, what of it?" sort of attitude.

It seems like every article and message that has come across my desk has dealt with the topic of change recently.  While my life has been in a state of flux and transition, it hasn't really been stressing me out too terribly.  (Maybe it has and I'm just too dense to figure it out... hence the "subtle hints" from above.)

In the midst of it all, I found this article in an old Harvard Business Review by Harold Sirkin, Perry Keenan, and Alan Jackson about "The Hard Side of Change Management."  Any change can be scored according to a roll of the DICE.  OK, their version of DICE is an acronym:

• Duration of time until the change program is completed
• Integrity of the project team's performance, or their ability to complete stuff on time
• Commitment to the change from both top management and employees
• Effort above and beyond the normal workload that the change initiative demands of employees

The combined score of these four elements can quantifiably predict how successful the project will be.  Simple enough, but it gave me pause to think about some of my upcoming changes and what it will take to sell them to the relevant stakeholders to make the project successful.

After getting the hard side of change pounded into my head this week, at our church yesterday we had a guest speaker.  Dean Trune is the Executive Director of Impact Ministries International, and he is one of the most powerful prayer warriors I've ever met or heard speak.  We bring in a speaker to fill the pulpit for one Sunday and what's his topic?  Change.  He approached change from a character point of view, using the life of Joseph to demonstrate how change is initiated and how we can harness it.

So that leads me to a few questions... how do you go about predicting the future success or failure of your organizational (and personal) changes?  How have you seen change playing out in your character and in the character of those around you?  Do we take accountability for the changes in our life which we actually initiate ourselves (perhaps unintentionally)?

Sarah... Palin Tall

I think we've heard this story before:  Lonely western man seeks partner for his next great adventure and chooses for his mate a woman who must adjust to a new life.  Can she do it?  OK, so John McCain chose a woman.  And it's been a fight of the media to see which hurricane deserves more attention this holiday weekend:  Gustav or Sarah Palin.

Let's put political ideologies aside for a second.  After all, elections really are more about marketing, advertising, and sales than political beliefs.  (Those of you dogmatically clinging to your party lines may quit reading now... you won't like what's coming next.)  As I mentioned last fall when I thought Hillary was the heir apparent, this election is about purple cows.  Everyone has endured decades of "two old white guys" running the country.  On both sides, we're all craving something a little different... just to see how it might work.

Now we've watched the Democrats cry foul whenever somebody made comments about Barack's inexperience.  We've listened to accusations about "playing the race card."  We heard the jokes about his "safe" selection of Joe Biden as his running mate.  We've just come off of a week of the convention "rah rah" as the Democrats heralded their new "operating system":  Obama '08.  Now along come the Republicans, with their release of McCain 2.0 with Palin add-on, stealing Barack's thunder from his speech the night before.

Yeah, but she's inexperienced.  Do we want somebody that inexperienced being a heartbeat away from the presidency?  (I'd rather have inexperience a heart-beat away from the presidency than IN the presidency.)  A couple of years ago, she was just a small-town mayor and a housewife.  What could somebody with five kids, an affinity for mooseburgers, and an appreciation for automatic weaponry possibly bring to the ticket?  (I've been around working mothers my whole life.  Anybody who can negotiate among five children could easily handle international accords.)  Her family values are compromised by taking such a high position.  (Besides the obvious hypocrisy of never asking men these questions, most women I know can multi-task better than we males can.)

Again, elections are more about perception than fact.  It's a marketing feeding frenzy at best.

Watching organizations for the past 20 years, I see staffing decisions handled with a devil-may-care approach.  Getting the wrong person into a role can be costly.  Criticizing the decision-makers who put the person there can be politically lethal.  Sarah Palin has a tall order to fill in the VP slot.  To be honest, this election is one change in Washington I'm curious about.  Will it be four more years of Bushisms?  I doubt it.  Neither party can afford to make the same blunders of the last eight years.  But no matter who wins, it's going to be an interesting nine weeks until election day.  Let the games begin!

How Green Are Your Relationships?

I almost strained a neck muscle from nodding too hard at a recent post in Joyful's Ponderings blog:

We’ve all met them. “High Maintenance” people. They’ll suck the life right out of you if you let them. You give them an inch, they take a mile. They are constantly needy. Friendship with them is draining. Seeing their number appear on the “call display” of your phone, brings hesitation as to whether you have time to pick up the receiver. Hearing their voice stifles an inner groan. Inviting them over for coffee takes mental and emotional preparation as they leave you exhausted.

Even when I wrote my post about God's Little Chew Toy early in my blogging career, I couldn't have described this class of individual any better.  Of course, Joyful goes on to develop a beautiful essay about being dependent on God's love, and how we should see these people through God's eyes and be more patient.  I'm sorry to admit it:  I'm still very, very human.  I've had people like that in my life, and eventually I had to phase them out.  It's one thing to be temporarily high maintenance.  We've all had those periods in our lives where life throws us a curve ball, and I have been amazingly grateful I had very patient people waiting for me throughout.  I'm even more grateful I've been able to help others through their bad periods.

But we're not talking about the temporarily high maintenance individual here.  We're talking the "long-term-suck-the-living-soul-right-out-of-you" brand of high maintenance.  I shared with one of my leadership classes recently that I was "going green" with my relationships.  If an individual consistently and constantly sucked up tremendous amounts of energy from me, then it was time to assess whether I needed to phase them out of my life.  Not an easy task, but many of us keep relationships around which have outlived their useful lives.  And then we wonder why we have no time for the relationships and activities in our lives which really do matter.

Before "going green" with a relationship, ask yourself the following:

• What is this person's outlook on life?  Can they make even the best of news sound horrible?
• When talking to this person, where does the balance of conversation lie?  Is it with them and their problems, or is the floor shared equally?  (After all, having friends with whom you can vent equally about life's little absurdities is healthy ... as long as it's mutually shared.)
• How do I feel after a conversation with this person?  Am I energized from having helped a friend, or am I more drained just by talking to them?
• Are the trials of this person caused by external circumstances or by their own bad decision-making?  Are they accountable and responsible for the things they do control, or do they flounder about in total helplessness?
• How long has this relationship been going on in this fashion?  Were they pleasant to be around at one point in our friendship?  Can I influence them back to that pleasant state?  Is there an end in sight to the circumstances which are making them high maintenance?
• What are long-term ramifications of keeping/ending the relationship?  Are there "residual" relationships which will be impacted?  How can you maintain the relationships you want and need to keep?  Keep in mind, going green is about sustainability.

Obviously, a decision like this isn't one to be taken hastily.  Relationships are not like light bulbs.  You can't just "unscrew" an energy-draining friend and replace them with a nice "compact fluorescent" friend.  Sometimes, a quick cut to a friendship is best.  Other times, it may mean a phased approach to closure.  It may even mean something in the middle (i.e., calling a "time out" from your friendship to allow you to regroup).  However, the thing to ultimately rememember is your relationships are still yours.  You're the one who has control.

Where's Your Cocoon?

I just answered a very challenging letter for Office-Politics.com.  My goal is always to provide workable strategies to allow the letter-writer to continue successfully in their current position.  However, in this case, a repeat letter writer made it painfully obvious the most feasible course of action was to leave a very toxic workplace situation (when people are committing suicide and having nervous breakdowns, it goes beyond simple office politics).

Honestly, I hate to have to give that advice.  I've overstayed my welcome in toxic workplaces and made best efforts to make things right before admitting to myself nothing will change and subsequently moving on.  My first boss out of college could best be described as an evil troll.  I endured for 18 months (collecting documentation) before threatening their boss with HR action.  I was moved to a different supervisor the next week.  Another part of my career, I worked for one consulting firm where the salesperson decided sabotaging my reputation was more fun than trying to sell my skills to clients.  While their efforts became evident early, it was tough to acknowledge somebody whom I once held in high regard could sink to such depths.

But I've also had to admit to myself that retreating isn't all bad.  I took the above picture in my backyard last week.  It was just providence that I caught the little guy in transit with his cocoon.  He's going to emerge as a magnificent butterfly, but right now he's in a state of retreat.  I was listening to Christine Kane's live performance CD "A Friday Night in One Lifetime" recently, and during one of her between-song monologues, she shared a story of a guy who stepped away from life and went camping for a while to regroup.  She stated her admiration for his decision, commenting that most of us think that when life starts talking to us, it means we should just push harder and order a venti instead of a grande at Starbucks.

I've learned over the past few years that having a retreat is a valuable part of life.  We've convinced ourselves working harder and faster is the way to success.  Where do you go when you REALLY NEED to regroup?  How do you heal the wounds inflicted?  What do you think about when you are breathing deeply and reflecting on what just happened?  What parameters do you set for yourself when retreating (time boundaries, do's and don'ts)?  What do you want to become when you emerge from your cocoon?  What is your sanctuary to move from worm to butterfly?

To All Employees

Employee Memorandum

FROM  Human Resources

RE  Supervisory Titles

A couple of years ago, it came to the attention of Human Resources that our company is behind the times on providing creative titles for our front-line supervisory staff.  We pride ourselves as being a company that responds quickly and decisively, so after much executive deliberation lasting several months and through numerous retreats, we agreed to form a committee to research the supervisory issue.

The research committee agreed that this is, indeed, a problem.  They looked at progressive companies across the world and informed us that the use of the term "supervisor" is antiquated and insulting.  As part of their final report, they recommended a task force be created to find new names for this vital role.

The task force acted with due diligence, spending millions of company dollars conducting only the foremost research.  They analyzed kinder terms such as "team leader" but still found them lacking.  They considered progressive terms such as "cheerleader" but feared some employees might find these terms demeaning.  They then looked researched more obscure walks of life, looking for terms in botany ("head nurturer" didn't sound strong enough), auto mechanics ("fine tuning technician" sounded a little autocratic), religion ("Satan" was copyrighted), and exotic arts ("pole dancer" had promise but one of the executives shifted uncomfortably whenever it was brought up).  The task force, unfortunately, came up with only one conclusion:  open an employee contest to name our supervisors.

We entertained numerous ideas from our bright and innovative front line staff.  Finally, as we were about to give up hope of ever finding a meaningful name for our front line supervisors, a drone from facilities management who has been assigned to research new cubicle configurations noticed an interesting parallel while visiting stall barn at the State Fair last week.  He submitted his idea based on his observations comparing stalls to cubicles, and we loved his insights.  Hence, it is with great pride that we unveil the new job title for our front-line supervisors, to go into effect immediately:

Mirror, Mirror, On the (Great) Wall

First, we find out some of the fireworks were merely computer-generated animation during the opening ceremony.

Then we find out the cute little girl singing was merely a lip-sync because the real voice was attached to a homelier child.

Next, there's the conflict over the ages of the female gymnasts.  (My wife, who knows high schoolers like the back of her hand, said there is no way some of those girls were even close to 16.  And she's seen Shawn Johnson on a regular basis for the past couple of years.  Way to go, US team, on the silver.  We're still proud of you!)

But what's next on the Beijing Olympics Image Scandal?  The awesome drum-corps at the beginning was merely a steroid-induced Beijing High Marching Band?  The little boy walking next to Yao Ming is actually an actor?  The Bird's Nest is just a scrap metal heap surrounding an out-dated stadium?  (OK, I'm not really convinced that last one might not be true.)

I've enjoyed reading the blog of another Tim Johnson, this one the Beijing Bureau Chief of McClatchy newspapers.  He's actually had some great wit and insight about the games, and being an American in China, he's had some fun thoughts about the reflection of the culture.

As with the Chinese Olympics, professional image is one of those issues in the office where people either care too much about the wrong things or not enough about the right ones.  It's a great example of a statistical bi-modal distribution.  I've seen people get offended about the littlest things because they allowed themselves to be overly affected by others' perceptions of them.  I've also seen people not care enough what colleagues and clients thought of them and their work habits... until it came back to bite them.

Here are some of the realities about perception and image:

• You can't control others' perceptions of you, but you can control what you do that might give off certain perceptions.  Before you go to lunch with somebody, or send out an email, or wear an outfit to the office, pause and ask yourself, "What message does this send?  Is it the message I want to send?"
• Do I care about the perceptions others have of me?  If I do, how can I affect those perceptions to the positive?  If I don't, how can I insulate myself from the hurtful reactions of others?
• You can find out how others perceive you.  I know of only a couple of people utterly lacking in self-awareness who truly blunder their way through one social interaction after another.  Watch others body language when you're in the room.  Watch eye contact and facial expressions when they are around you.
• Look for patterns of behavior.  Isolated incidents can be explained away.  A series of behavioral incidents send up red flags and sirens pretty quickly.
• "Consider the source."  It was advice my parents always gave me.  If the person causing trouble has very little credibility, then don't worry too much about them.  They will burn themselves out.

What other pieces of advice have you found helpful in managing your perceptions of others or, conversely, others' perceptions of you?

It's All Relative

Many years ago, about six weeks after my wedding, I received an education in marriage I won't soon forget.  I was given the (ahem) opportunity to spend an extended weekend with my wife, her mother, and her maternal grandmother in one small farmhouse in the middle of nowhere northeast Missouri.  It was a fascinating anthropological study to observe the three of them interacting... with each other and with me.  (Of course, if I use any terms like "alpha female," my wife and/or mother-in-law can and will make my life miserable, so we'll avoid being overly clinical for the sake of my continued breathing.)  The short version is I learned what makes my wife tick.  What personality traits she didn't inherit directly from her mother had skipped a generation.  In other words, I received a lesson in CONTEXT.  So now, when my wife does something I perceive as illogical or irrational delightfully quirky (um... no comment), I merely think back to that weekend.

In order to keep me out of any further trouble, let's shift gears, shall we?  How often do we try to look for the context in our office politics situations?  Or for that matter, how often do we even bother looking for context in any organizational setting?  Do we know why people act the way they do?  Do we even try to figure it out?  I ran across the Positive Influence blog and a great post on the topic of context.  The author provides a massive bullet list to explain why motivational efforts fail in organizations.  Jerry wraps up the analysis quite succinctly yet eloquently:

I hope you are beginning to develop a sense of how the context—the circumstances, preceding conditions, history, situational factors, peer factors, supervisory interpersonal skills, company culture, and supervisory-employee interpersonal history coalesces to make the act of “wandering around the workplace trying to catch someone doing something good,” a risky and perhaps counterproductive activity. Any one of these items can negate the value of a manager or supervisor's attempt to positively reinforce an employee with a positive verbal comment.

Before you react (or overreact) to your next workplace conflict, think about the issue of context and do a little background research to figure out WHY people are acting in a way which may not make sense to you.

Avoiding the DISS-ciple

Did you know that if you flip the syllables on the word mentor, with a slight adjustment you get the word torment?

Two decades into the professional world, I've had the opportunity to have a mentor as well as be a mentor.  The best mentor relationships are those that have grown naturally out of respect and trust, where both parties were open to listening and taking action.

But there have been some disastrous mentor-protege relationships as well.  The ones which have been assigned as an "orientation buddy" rarely work.  Those mentor relationships that are forged out of "damage control" also often end badly.  When I was learning the "tricks of the trade" in team facilitation, I was assigned to a mentor to develop these skills.  "Mary" thought the sun rose and set in herself, and she was also very insecure (yeah, the irony of her being a facilitation mentor isn't lost on me either).  If I didn't hang on her every word, if I dared to take one of her ideas and expand it to try something new, if I didn't fluff her ego enough, Mary ran straight to my boss and complained that I was "difficult to work with."  You can guess where that relationship went.

The trick is to determine whether you want to build a protege or a disciple.  (Now before you wig out on the term, it does not have to have religious overtones of Jim Jones' Koolaid stand.)  As a matter of fact, Paul Hoffman writes a brilliant post on the topic in the Top Management Tips blog.  The four stages of discipleship really define what a successful mentor-protege relationship look like:

The first stage is initiation, the protégé recognizes and appreciates the talents, and expertise the mentor brings to the relationship. Second, the protégé and mentor begin a process of interpersonal bonding. In this deepening relationship, they begin sharing vision, values, and connecting personal goals and organizational goals. At some point the third stage occurs, separation. The protégé or the discipling mentor experiences a drifting apart. One or the other receives a promotion, become physically separated, or the protégé is more independent. The final, fourth stage is redefinition. Some event in the organizational life of the protégé brings her/him back to the former mentor. They re-establish their relationship on different terms, not as mentor and protégé.

Ask yourself these questions about your current mentor-protege relationships:

1. Was it assigned or cultivated?
2. Did it develop out of necessity or nature?
3. Do the mentor and protege genuinely see something in each other worth investing in the relationship?
4. Are both gaining value out of the relationship?
5. Is it interdependent rather than codependent?
6. Is there a goal in mind for the relationship?  (examples: indoctrination into a culture, behavior change, skill development)
7. Is there so much riding on the relationship that it becomes too important to fail?

You can surmise the "right" and "wrong" answers from the above questions.  If there's more TORMENTING than MENTORING going on, it leads to one more question:  what are YOU going to do about it?