Flipping the Birds
The other night, I was at my older daughter's honor choir concert. While they were singing the folk song, "Risseldy Rosseldy," I felt myself getting uneasy, like I needed to look over my shoulder. Being an office politics consultant, I allow myself a healthy degree of paranoia, but this overwhelming urge at a music concert was odd. Then it hit me: this was the song the children were singing in the background during the iconic playground scene in Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds."
If you've never seen the movie, shame on you. Hitchcock builds suspense like few can, and this movie is no exception. In the scene in question, Tippi Hedren's character, Melanie Daniels, is sitting outside the schoolhouse waiting to talk to the teacher and check on the well-being of the children after numerous bird attacks in the area. The children are inside singing a very repetitive song, the chorus being sung sweetly and innocently over and over again. Behind Melanie, birds are gathering on the playground equipment while she, impatient and oblivious, sits with her back to the impending danger. You, the spectator, want to scream, "WOULD YOU JUST TURN AROUND!?!?!?!"
In my career, I've seen a similar scenario played out often. I see individuals or departments who are sitting on the bench getting agitated, while doom flocks behind them just out of sight. Of course, they have the power to turn around and see the danger for what it is, but they're too absorbed in their own little "here and now." So they sit. And they wait. And they ignore.
What are some of the flocks gathering behind them?
- Processes - Out-of-control processes seem to compound themselves. If a new input, like a novice employee or a software conversion, is introduced, it brings the flawed processes to light. However, most people tend to blame the new input for the problems rather than placing blame where it lies.
- Toxic Employees - Amazing what one or two really toxic people can do to a workplace and how quickly their cancer can spread to others if left unchecked. Management may relegate it to a "coaching opportunity" or an "HR issue" but it doesn't make the morale improve for those who have to endure.
- Policies and Procedures - I admire companies who have very small, finite sets of policies and procedures. They're able to hire bright, self-governing individuals who don't need a lot of direction. However, other companies weigh their otherwise high-performing employees down with ridiculous rules written to govern a select few who should just be fired.
- Behavior - It's hard to look in the mirror sometimes and see how your own behaviors, decisions, and performance may be flocking together to undo all the good you think you've done in your career. Looking at the three above is relatively easy by comparison. It's somebody else's fault. This is one where a good self-reflection can prevent you from getting pecked to death when you least expect it.
Some people assume they are safe exactly where they are. They never feel the need to turn around. So... before it's too late, are you willing and able to turn around?

Another week of blogospheric silence... what gives?
OK, I'll try to make this my parting shot on the presidential campaign. For all of you caught up in the emotional sweep of Obama-ism, you're not going to like this. 
An article in the Des Moines Register yesterday led me to 
Pssst. McCain is winning in a poll. But don't tell anyone, OK?
How do you combat this? It's simple, just ask questions. "Have you ever seen Susan miss a critical project milestone because of a family event?" That generally stops the office politician dead in his tracks. Often, she or he relies on this kind of "stretch of logic" to get their job done. If you choose not to play along, you can accomplish your job... finding the truth.
I know a lot of ostriches. It seems there are just too many people who go out of their way to avoid office politics at any cost because they don't want to get hurt. Getting hurt is universally bad, so anything that could cause hurt can't be good. Therefore, they want to avoid office politics.
But why would I do a thing like that? Some kind of testosterone-laden perversely-masochistic fun? (OK, well, sort of.) But as I told one of the commanders, if I'm able to help an officer achieve a straighter shot or clearer thinking if the real event occurs, then putting myself out there to be bruised up a little bit for a few evenings is a worthwhile investment to me as a citizen.
The other night, during a family outing to the mall, my wife took my older daughter to look for some clothes, leaving my younger daughter and me to fend for ourselves at the mall playground. Always the people-watcher, I observed the other dads who had been banished to play-land and started noticing a really interesting trend. It started with one other dad who was obviously a first time father. I say this for two reasons: 1) he still was wearing designer clothes, and 2) he was hovering over his little girl, never letting his hand more than two inches away from her at any point. On the other end of the spectrum were the dads who obviously had more than one child there; they were vaguely aware that they had offspring in the area. As long as there was no bloodshed or loss of consciousness, they were content to sit on the sidelines. Me? I like playing with Abby, but I'm cool with giving her space to explore on her own a little bit, so I guess I fit somewhere in the middle.
(WARNING TO HARRY POTTER FANS: BOOK 7 SPOILER INCLUDED IN FINAL PARAGRAPH.)
Living with a toddler means that you'll hear the phrase, "I'll do it myself" a lot between the ages of two and four. The kids are trying to assert their independence and it's up to us parents to figure out when to intervene and take over and when to back off and let our kids make a few mistakes. It's all part of the learning process.
"I can't tell who I'm running against sometimes."
Everyone knows the rules. Cars are inanimate objects. They are not alive. They cannot think for themselves. They cannot act for themselves. They must be driven. Those are the rules.
Then there's Christine, the evil-possessed Plymouth Fury of Stephen King's imagination. Her rule breaking is based on malice and jealousy. It is based on sabotage and injury and destruction. People who cross Christine wind up dead.
And so we need to figure out WHY we're labeling somebody as a loose cannon, and if their rule-breaking tendencies actually can add value to the organization and to their coworkers. That should be part of your diagnosis before taking action.
Wow! Either there are a lot of people who are dealing with office politics (and wondering how to handle office politics), or Franke James just likes me. (For those who don't know, she is the editor and owner of
To my fellow Iowans:
You didn't think I was going to let 
I don't even need to tally votes or watch the polls tonight to find out who the winners are for the Iowa Caucuses. I've already identified one Democrat and two Republicans who are winners: Tom Vilsack, Tom Tancredo, and Sam Brownback.
However, in office politics, sometimes knowing when to drop out of a conflict and walk away can make you a big winner in the end. Too few people know how to lose a battle in order to win a war. I wrote a post a few months ago on
In retrospect, it was probably blown way out of proportion, but it happened nonetheless.
Um... Duncan who?
It's been interesting to watch 
From now through Thursday night, I thought it would be fun to inject some "office politics" insight into the behaviors of the political candidates, all scrambling like silly little ants over the picnic crumbs. Since the Iowa Caucuses are fast approaching, we'll see if we can glean some office politics lessons from their behaviors.
My good friend (and dance-partner, but that's another story),
I want to take Glenda's post one step further to a critical situation I see happening all too often. No, it's not about the value of finding a good dentist, although Herbie the Elf plays a critical role in this issue. And no, it's not that "bumbles bounce," despite Yukon Cornelius' role in saving the day. The key point that I wish more people would take from this story is that if you're going to dare to be different, it really helps to have other allies watching your back.
1Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, there came wise men from the East to Jerusalem, 2saying, "Where is He that is born King of the Jews? For we have seen His star in the East and have come to worship Him." 3When Herod the king had heard these things, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him. 4And when he had gathered all the chief priests and scribes of the people together, he demanded of them where Christ should be born.

Since I like to "geek out" on office politics, one of my "governmentally" political friends asked me the other day whom I was favoring in the 
"First they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out, because I was not a Jew. Then they came for the Communists, and I did not speak out, because I was not a Communist. Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out, because I was not a Trade Unionist. Then they came for me, and there was no one left to speak out for me." Pastor Martin Niemoller, on the progression of Nazi occupation in Europe.
OK, so Leona Helmsley, the "Queen of Mean," is now going to be pushing up daisies... er... um... ok... maybe just weeds and occasional prickly thorn bushes. Many of you remember the stories that surfaced about her savage abuse of her employees during her years as a powerful hotel maven.

