Honey, I Think My Water Broke

Those were the words that started my day eight years ago today.  Of course, I had been sick as a dog the night before, and in my doped-up-on-anti-nausea-medication-at-2:45-in-the-morning stupor, my first response to my very expectant wife was "That's nice, dear."  Then the synapses connected.  Any sign of illness disappeared in a heartbeat as I moved into hyper-project-manager mode.  Of course, this was occurring 15 days before our scheduled due date.  First children are statistically late.  We hadn't packed our bags yet.  And even worse for a quasi-techie guy like me... We didn't yet know how to use our new video camera (which explains why the first footage of our first child was shot in "night vision").

Nevertheless, Lauren Elizabeth was destined to arrive on December 2, 1999 at 6:53 AM.  And my life has never been the same since.  At that moment, I attained a new title:  Dad.  It's a role that is a work-in-progress.  I've learned a lot in the past eight years, but it seems like the "education lab" remains open 24/7.  We're on the cusp of adolescence.  There are so many things to think about.  I never feel like I've arrived, and I doubt I ever will.  But that's a good thing in my book.  Complacency and parenthood really don't go well together.

Sometimes, I feel like my children teach me much more than I teach them.  We laugh and read and learn and hurt and cry and run and hug and create and giggle and whisper and shout and love.  And we do it over and over again.  We change the scenery and the mood and the characters and the plot... but the story's ending is always pretty happy.  Parenting is a great work of art on an ever-changing and never-ending canvas.  The only difference between parenting and painting is that the canvas can and does talk back.  It's about give-and-take.  Sometimes it's a win-win and other times it's a "Trust me; I'm doing this for your own good.  Still other times, it's painful enough to say, "You need to make the decision, but I'll be there to help you if you need it."

I know people who have been parenting a lot longer than I have.  They do it really darn well, and they make it look so easy.  They look like they've never shed a tear over worry or uncertainty or inadequacy.  I know that deep down somewhere there must be feelings of insecurity, but they don't show it.  But then I get the perfect affirmation from my daughters to let me know that I must be doing something right:  a hug and an "I love you, Daddy."  And I think back to my wife's life-changing words at 2:45 in the morning eight years ago.  And it feels good to be a parent.

(Happy Birthday, Lauren.  Today was your big day, but you gave me the greatest gift of all.)

Mind The Gap

Wow.... London was incredible!  I've accumulated enough information on British History to blog examples of project management and office politics for many posts to come.  The monarchy has nothing on modern-day corporations when it comes to running - or ruining - an organization (be it a Medieval land, a not-for-profit, or a huge conglomerate).

My wife was an incredible tour guide, packing in the truly must-see events and activities into 10 days.  I teased her a lot about the "vacation death march" but the trip would not have been the same without her knowledge of where to go and how to get there.

Speaking of how to get there, there was a sign on the London Underground to "Mind The Gap."  It's all part of a safety campaign to get people to pay attention when entering and exiting the train.  (Another thing I liked about the Brits; in America, we'd simply say "Caution!" or "Watch Out!"  They're much more polite about their admonitions.)  Of the millions upon millions who ride the subway each year, there were 53 injuries last year.  Not a bad average, but still not good enough for those managing "the tube."

Upon closer inspection, "mind the gap" is really more of a life philosophy than just a simple subway safety sign.  Each of us is someplace in life, and we're all probably trying to get somewhere else.  The gap is the distance between those two.  Failure to mind the gap means missed project deadlines and overdrawn budgets.  Failure to mind the gap also means unaccomplished goals and ignored dreams.

For Londoners, the Underground is so second-nature that many of them don't even notice the gap... "minding" it is almost thoughtless.  Still, when somebody doesn't mind the gap, it can mean a subway line is down for hours and the other lines are clogged due to the overflow.  For those of us on life's journey, ignoring the gap comes with other consequences like missed opportunities and failed projects.

"Mind the gap."  Not a bad lesson from a subway station.

Technorati Tags: london, underground, tube, mind the gap

Across The Pond

My apologies for not posting more this week.  You see, I've been transported to a parallel universe since Wednesday and am trying to make heads-or-tails out of it.  Well, that's partially true.  I'm "on holiday" in London right now, and not being the travel hound, I'm figuring out a few things fast:

• The "tube" subway system is very logical to navigate
• They all say "toMAHto here and if you say "toMAYto" they look at you like you're from a parallel universe
• The "look both ways before you cross the street" admonition from Mom applies doubly over here
• London is a city of paradox:  old yet constantly reinventing; traditional yet trendy; relaxed yet bustling; utilitarian yet glitzy
• I have no future as paparazzi:  one sighting of the Queen only yielded an average photograph of her backside.  What self-respecting magazine will buy a picture of Her Royal Highness's rear entering her car?
• Make sure your carry-on luggage includes essentials for two days... especially if you're flying Northwest

There will be other lessons as well, but for the most part, it's been a wonderful adventure and a much needed get-away for the wife and me.  Will keep posting as I have time.

Technorati Tags: London, Tube, Holiday, Lessons Learned

Oops!

The picture is compliments of www.despair.com and for those of you who have not discovered it yet, it's a treasure trove of humor for those of us who have become a bit cynical to the culture of Successories lip service.  The reason for sharing this is to introduce you to a fun and informative blog.  Michael Krigsman was kind enough to backtrack to Carpe Factum this weekend from a recent post.  His blog, Rearranging the Deck Chairs (think Titanic) is a fun blogosphere romp through what is wrong with projects today.  Michael has some great insights, and I'm glad he introduced himself.  Have a great weekend.

Technorati Tags: despair.com, Michael Krigsman, project failure, Rearranging the Deck Chairs

Resurrecting the Habit

After an extended hiatus caused by the realities of life, I decided it was time to get back into the habit of working out.  My workout schedule and routine, when set, are fairly consistent.  Wake up at 4:30, dressed and to the Y by 4:55, 100 ab crunches, 40 minutes on the exercise bike, come home, do the power cords, then get the kids and myself ready for our respective days.  Hence, my body has had to adjust to a new sleep schedule and relearn my old workout routine.  The two words that best describe my current existence are "ow" and "yawn."

(By the way, kudos to Rick, Cecilia, Steve, Mary, and the other folks working out at the Y at that ungodly hour for your warm reception back and your encouragement this week.  It's been great seeing all of you again and catching up.)

Project rigor is also a habit, and it can be a painful habit to adjust, but it's equally rewarding in the end when followed faithfully.  I was on a project a few years ago where I was working for an alarming scattered manager who informed me that she did not want me to write a weekly status report, monthly would do.  While I protested, she made it quite clear that it was not time she wanted "wasted" - there were other things to do.  Against my better judgment, I followed her lead.  When things "went south" on the project, she had me over a barrel as the needed documentation was not there.  I started doing weekly status reports as part of the project recovery and she terminated my contract as the frequent documentation surfaced the fact that she was the bottleneck of the project's problems (which explained her earlier resistance).  Oh well.  It was a good lesson learned.

Artifacts such as status reports, project plans, and issues logs are the lifeblood of a well-run project.  If your project is fully staffed with Carpe Factum poster children who are all over-achieving accomplishment-mongers and who trust and respect each other, then you can come and talk to me about relaxing the project rigor.  Now, where did I leave my heating pad?  Ow!

Technorati Tags: YMCA, workout, project management, status report, lessons learned